Italian Film Review

Blonde in Black Leather / Qui comincia l'avventura (1976)

2012-01-28T01:04:00.000-08:00

Harmless and silly, seldom hilarious, Blonde in Black Leather is a road movie comedy that succeeds in winning over an audience on the strength of the charms of the delightful pairing of Monica Vitti and Claudia Cardinale under the direction of Carlo Di Palma, a man better known as a cinematographer. Each shot is well thought out and seems to be selected and composed to provide the most interesting backdrops to the lead pairing as they interact on remote bridges, in pleasant valleys, on beaches, before sunsets and in an illuminated creepy forest. It all looks nice, is paced well and even moments of slapstick are used sparingly enough to be forgivable.

Guido Leontini, henchman extraordinaire, appears briefly while Riz Ortolani provides a quirky genre compatible soundtrack.

Church, The / La chiesa (1989)

2012-01-27T16:30:00.000-08:00

There are so many familiar references in The Church that at times the film feels like a horror movies greatest hits with scenes recreated from The Shining, in this instance the typing of madness, Poltergeist, the crumbling face in the mirror and a demon copulation with a Satanic entourage in attendance straight out of Rosemary's Baby. In execution however the film feels like Indiana Jones meets Demons and Lucio Fulci's Gates of Hell trilogy as an ensemble get the full-on Pandora's Box treatment upon becoming locked in a church.

On top of all this the film has brief scenes that capture the feel of movies such as The Gate, The Crazies and even The Evil Dead. The Church indeed speaks the language of horror, albeit in a way that feels a little over familiar and generic.

Stylistically the film is not distinctly European in execution and, as with Demons and Cemetery Man, this is a horror that could have an appeal that transcends audiences more au fait with Eurocult and the quirks and distinct styles of horror and exploitation directors such as Rollin, Argento, Fulci or Jess Franco. This is far more mainstream.

Amongst familiar Eurocult names such as young Asia Argento, Barbara Cupisti and Giovanni Lombardo Radice the real surprise is the appearance of Holby City regular Hugh Quarshie. He's pretty good here too.

Superargo / L'invincibile Superman (1968)

2012-01-26T01:08:00.000-08:00

There can't be too many superheroes who can shatter a vase using only their mind. This awesome power, plus the ability to stop people decapitating him with an axe using nothing but an intense stare make Superargo the only man able to foil the incoherent scheme of a rather effete master criminal plus his army of lobotomised athletes.

Paolo Bianchini's addition to the Italian superhero genre lacks Diabolik's elan and The Fantastic Argoman's ability to find a woman's cocktail cabinet, but the Jaguar-driving champion wrestler still provides a solid, tongue-in-cheek action hero.

Given the inherent absurdities of the genre, Superargo and the Faceless Giants is a little too staid to be a real romp, and lacks a memorable villain, but there are still some memorable moments. Standout scenes include Superargo foiling an attack of the titular giants by throwing a tree trunk at them, Tex Avery-style, and the hero's mystical Indian guru screaming like a girl as he falls into a pool of quicksand.

Furrow of the Peach, The / Il solco di pesca (1975)

2012-01-23T06:04:00.000-08:00

With a title taken from a dedication to the derrière of Elizabeth Barret Browning it should be immediately obvious that that this pygophilia inspired affair attempts to create a highbrow comedy from the more generally lowbrow genre of the sex comedy. Themes pondered include guilt, fetishism, theology, history, psychology, philosophy, literature and classical Latin and it is all very clever. Unfortunately it is exceptionally unfunny most of the time. Mildly amusing yes, a diversion yes, but one almost totally devoid of laugh out loud moments despite the breezy score and absurd situations promising fun.

On the plus side it is a film that may, for some at least, hold up to repeat viewing as there is far more to consider here than the more prevalent slapstick routines of the more populist sex comedies. For many however the juxtaposition of sexual hi-jinx and intellectual masturbation of the South Bank Show variety may prove to be too much. Indeed, it is not totally clear whether the film seeks to legitimise the genre in polite company or take the piss out of the general mass market target audience of the filone.

For a far more entertaining take on the core theme of the film there is Lucio Fulci's The Senator Likes Women or some of the later comedy works of Tinto Brass. That said, it is still nice to see Gloria Guida in something with a little more depth than the usual Confessions or Carry On type film and if there is a strata of Chekov loving, Browning quoting, Latin speaking, existentialist ass worshippers out there who would like to spend a pleasant hour and a half watching Guida bending over in stockings and short maid outfits while Martine Brochard pouts incessantly then this is surely the film that fits the bill. It's all a bit like one of those boring, yet worthy, comedies that came out of Britain in the mid to late 1980s except with more flesh and no Timothy Spall.

Ultrà (1991)

2012-01-22T15:39:00.000-08:00

The football hooligan movie is a notoriously difficult genre to pull off successfully and has historically been a hit and miss affair with even the more successful titles often failing on points of detail that undermine the required realism.

While it is the British that have been the most prolific in this area Ultrà is, at the very least, equal to any offering from Blighty. Certainly up there with The Firm and miles better than the ludicrous Hobbit offering that fails for the unconvincing inclusion of Elijah Wood or the gone-native ID with its comedic hunchback hooligan and a Titty Twister style pub.

Mostly set on an overnight football-special train to a Juventus game the film is, in essence, a battle between two alpha males over a woman and for influence within the hierarchy of the AS Roma firm as the former top boy returns from prison to find he has lost both his status in the pack and his girlfriend to his best friend.

Child actor turned director Ricky Tognazzi helms and the stars Claudio Amendola and Ricky Memphis would return to work under the direction of the maestro in the excellent crime thriller La scorta.

Bubù (1972)

2012-01-22T12:21:00.000-08:00

Based on the novel Bubu de Montparnasse this sort of a precursor to Giuliano Carnimeo's The Secrets of a Callgirl is a period drama makes wonderful use of locations around Milan to create a visual feast that at times seems to be inspired by the work of Renoir and in particular Luncheon of the Boating Party.

Ottavia Piccolo is incredible as Berta who is cajoled then bullied into prostitution by her manipulative boyfriend played by Antonio Falsi.

While the message from Sex Madness that syphilis is bad is repeated here this is not exploitation cinema. Instead it is a heartbreaking costume tale, one in which despite the interests of philanthropists Berta's destruction is as tragic as it is inevitable.

Check to the Queen / Scacco alla regina (1969)

2012-01-22T09:09:00.000-08:00

Pasquale Festa Campanile follows in the erotic drama tradition of The Libertine in this cool and sexy feature of the kind that European filmmakers produced throughout the late 1960s and early 1970s but surprisingly this one was to be overlooked by Audubon Films despite it being a perfect companion to Venus in Furs or the work Radley Metzger was directing at the time.

A pre-Interrabang and Queens of Evil Haydée Politoff, bored and rich, seeks comfort in her enslavement as she gives herself to a mistress who looks after her and rewards good behaviour and punishes the bad.

If there is a serious political point being made then it is that the bourgeois crave the order and deference of slavery but, rather than dwell on this aside, it is better to revel in the parade of swanky parties, erotic situations, boudoir philosophy, psychedelic bondage dreams and a Blow-Up inspired photo-shoot.

Those who love Belle de jour, The Coming of Sin or The Story of O will no doubt love this too. It is in that ballpark after all and at times has themes common to all three. The is film clearly meant to appeal to those who fetishise sadomasochism yet the considerable nostalgia value of the styles and the swanky retro-futurist sets is likely to find a considerable amount of love way beyond the initial target audience.

OSS 117: Murder for Sale / Niente rose per OSS 117 (1968)

2012-01-22T02:46:00.000-08:00

A peek at who would’ve played James Bond in Diamonds are Forever, John Gavin, before being replaced by Sean Connery, is offered in this well-made Eurospy addition that further benefits from the presence of Margaret Lee as well as brief roles from Rosalba Neri and Thunderball’s Luciana Paluzzi. Gavin is a likable lead, as OSS 117, and a good actor, but he lacks the charisma that is characteristic of most Eurospy leads, and his attempts at smooth comical one-liners usually miss.

The best acting comes from Curd Jűrgens as the main villain, housing and locking down dozens of professional assassins in an isolated mansion, like it’s a boarding school, whose intents are appalling enough to warrant viewer’s interest in 117’s mission.

Instead of supplementing the movie with Sci-Fi elements to disguise a weak plot, Murder for Sale actually makes an admirable effort at telling a story, and it is also a pleasure to see Margaret Lee stand up to George Eastman; Antropophagus himself.

Devil is a Woman, The / Il sorriso del grande tentatore (1974)

2012-01-20T15:49:00.000-08:00

It is tempting to compare the versatile and incredible Glenda Jackson's Sister Geraldine, by far the star of The Tempter, with Anita Ekberg's Sister Gertrude and it would be no surprise if it happened to be the case that Killer Nun was an exploitation on some of the key themes of The Devil Is a Woman. However, possibly a fairer comparison would be to the character Nurse Ratched of One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. Indeed it is to this film that The Tempter should be compared as there are innumerable points of intersection.

Director and writer Damiano Damiani, he of Bullet for the General fame and a man also responsible for some of the most overtly political Italian crime thrillers, here takes a critical view of the institution and rituals of the clergy.

As with In The Highest of Skies there is something of a hint of the surreal in the execution of the feature and also a number of similar themes are explored, especially power struggles, repressed taboo sexuality and the clash between the dialectical materialism and rationalism of the Marxist and the idealism and obscurantism of the church hierarchy. In this the film pulls no punches.

Claudio Cassinelli and Lisa Harrow work well in leading roles but, on the downside, the relegation of Ely Galleani to a walk on role is nothing short of a scandal.

Amuck! / Alla ricerca del piacere (1972)

2012-01-16T10:04:00.000-08:00

The definitive steamy suspense or chamber giallo, Amuck! features and trades upon the inspired pairing of Barbara Bouchet and Rosalba Neri. Director Silvio Amadio stirs up a heady brew with sensual sapphic interludes, fairytale stag films and murder, adding spice to an already over-heated concoction. Bouchet and Neris’ slo-mo tryst has justifiably become the stuff of legend, and is treated by Amadio, the master of such fodder, with a dreamy sumptuousness that emphasises the erotic over the explicit. In fact, for all the torrid couplings on display here, Amuck! is a touchingly innocent affair, often resembling an adventure of a Nancy Drew who has grow up and unrepentantly given in to her desires.

Bouchet is entirely serviceable as the short skirted, wide-eyed heroine, however, it’s Neri who steals the acting honours, attacking her role as the amoral, perverse and downright wicked Eleanor with delicious abandon. If there was ever a character devised to showcase her unique brand of fierce femininity and lithesome loveliness, Eleanor is it.

Amuck! Is held in high regard by giallo fans, and quite rightly so, for the film shamelessly and joyfully exults in naughty, sexy fun.

Warm Life, The / La calda vita (1964)

2012-01-16T09:36:00.000-08:00

The camera certainly loves the Italian coast and none more so than here in La calda vita. The camera also adores Catherine Spaak.

This is a beach movie, a romance, a coming of age tale and a drama with tragedy thrown in for good measure. While the film is, in part, an excuse for Catherine Spaak to bounce around at the beach in various states of undress there is a darker drama that lurks beneath the surface as jealousy and strained friendships are tested on an excursion to a beach hut on an exquisite seashore.

La Calda vita is, in all respects, a feast for the eyes and one that cannot fail to please. It has none of the dark undercurrent of So Young, So Lovely, So Vicious, nor the exploitation themes of Sisters of Ursula. It has none of the thriller qualities of Top Sensation and it possesses none of the boat based class politics of Waves of Lust. These titles may benefit from delightful coastline settings but there are other things that can be done at the beach. The Warm Life is one of those things. It also has far more depth than Summer Affair, another island based romance benefiting from azure skies and turquoise seas, but yet it still finds time for the obligatory messing around in bikinis, water-skis and boats. It even has a stock footage shark, albeit only for a few seconds.

They Have Changed Their Face / ...hanno cambiato faccia (1971)

2012-01-15T11:14:00.000-08:00

Mist shrouded and sparse countryside, the sort that may be seen in a Rollin vampire film, swanky sweaters and cool counterculture sexual liberation. Cars chasing through woodland à la To Be Twenty, the erotic tone of Baba Yaga, the clean minimalist interiors of Femina ridens and a within a Gothic setting. There are crypts and golf courses, superstitious villagers and even a car through the streets opening that is more common to the Eurocrime genre.

Corrado Farina directs and Adolfo Celi is Nosferatu, the bloodsucking capitalist.

Politically radical in tone, the film runs with the concept of personal liberation and freedom and builds this within the context of a political, social and economic conspiracy as industrialists, politicians, media and church conspire and quote Fellini, Freud, Jean-Luc Godard, de Sade and Marx while preparing a marketing campaign for LSD sprays in family sized bottles that are ready to ship to the shops while re-branding ecologically unsound detergent as Clean Water.

Sex is allowed in the workplace, but not reading, freedom is an illusion of marketing men and jingles play in the shower. Those who dig the brainy erotica of The Lickerish Quartet or even the conspiratorial tone of Short Night of Glass Dolls should make every effort to track this baby down.

Macabre / Macabro (1980)

2012-01-15T08:06:00.000-08:00

There is something of a Filmirage feel to the New Orleans set Macabro. The film, a tale of an average woman and her sexually charged relationship with the decapitated head of her deceased lover, takes director Lamberto Bava and collaborator Pupi Avati into Buio Omega territory.

The Hammer House of Horror style ending feels a little contrived and is, truth to tell, cringeworthy. But all else is certainly worth the time.

The film is a little twisted, as would be expected from the theme of necrophilia, but is probably a little restrained given the potential of the material and it is mind boggling to explore the possibilities that were presented and how they would have played out had the project been under the direction of Joe D'Amato.

Adventures of Pinocchio, The / Le avventure di Pinocchio (1972)

2012-01-15T05:33:00.000-08:00

Luigi Comencini's made-for-television adaptation of Carlo Collodi's text is a real gem. First rate performances all round, combined with a mind boggling attention to the minutia of period detail really brings the wooden one to life. Aside from a brief scene in which a donkey is clearly in distress and needlessly harassed for the sake of entertainment Le avventure di Pinocchio makes for near perfect family entertainment.

Franco and Ciccio are great in their roles as the cat and fox, but it is Nino Manfredi as Geppetto, who contrary to claims by Tanya Donnelly and Belly does nothing at all involving lying on top of anything or anyone, and an exceptional debut from the young Andrea Balestri as the puppet-in-human-form that makes this feature such an enjoyable viewing experience. Magical.

Fumettophobia (1973)

2012-01-14T10:47:00.000-08:00

Fumettophobia is largely a polemic in support of comic books and graphic novels. It really adds little to the understanding of the format or it's history but nevertheless makes a spirited defence of the leave-the-kids-alone variety.

Bizarrely however, maybe in a fit of counterculture overexcitability, hyperbole rears it's head for the zillionth time as the documentary begins to overstate the revolutionary potential unleashed by looking at Crepax's drawings of Valentina's tits or pictures of chubby Gauls.

The case for the educational value of reading is made, and made well, the defence of the medium against the conservative and censorious neo-bookburner busybodies of the type that would later inspire the term video nasty is also excellent. However it should have been painfully obvious at the time that even were the necessary liberalisation of the art form to prevail it was unlikely that the masses would one day dare to dream that they could revolutionize society and overthrow the banking system, as the film suggests they should, under the banner of Valentina Rosselli's minge.

The medium would, however, inspire Corrado Farina to make Baba Yaga.

Diva Dolorosa (1999)

2012-01-14T09:26:00.000-08:00

While it is the case that Diva Dolorosa is not in itself an Italian production the film is made up entirely of an assemblage of clips from the Italian diva movies of the silent era cut together as a thematically organised montage of such titles as the near perfect Rapsodia satanica and the tragic Il fuoco.

Genre themes of madness, love and death in the bourgeois parlour are explored along with the other key tropes of this fascinating period of cinema history.

Not to take any credit away from Lyda Borelli, or indeed the other greats of the genre, but it is the striking, quirky and spasmodic style of Pina Menichelli that particularly holds the attention as she jerks about, rolls her eyes, flops and flails as if acting under the influence of overcharged vibrating Ben-Wa Balls. This is hypnotic.

The film is essential viewing for those who wish to dip a toe in to the cool pleasant waters of early Italian cinema and some fine cinematography and outlandish yet compelling performances make the project far more than a mere curiosity. Highly recommended.

Shango / Shango, la pistola infallibile (1970)

2012-01-10T19:04:00.000-08:00

Stunningly awful Anthony Steffen vehicle that attempts to maul the plots of The Tramplers, 1965 by way of The Hellbenders, 1967 with a stop over into The Good, The Bad and The Ugly, 1966 territory. A Confederate major searches for a hidden cache of Union gold in an effort to jump start the war again. Only Shango, a prisoner of war, knows its location. A gang of Mexican banditos are also after the gold and they team up with the devious major to find the riches. Unfortunately, Shango escapes and hides out in a poverty stricken village. The villains take over the town till the inhabitants hand over Shango.

Someone needed to find some gold to fund a better script than what star Steffen and director Mulargia were able to wrangle between them. First the major needs Shango to find the loot, then later wants him dead and the money is never mentioned again nor is it ever found! This hidden Union war chest was supposed to be the centerpiece by which the main characters revolved, but apparently a Civil War of sorts was raging behind the scenes.

Steffen is incredibly weak here as the hero. He's either being captured, or escaping only to be captured again a short time later. The "action" scenes consist of Super Steffen rapidly firing his gun, the only one in existence that fires a hundred bullets without reloading, as half a dozen extras spin and twirl before hitting the ground. After a few scenes like this, it quickly becomes tiresome and a lazy excuse for choreographing the action. At one point, Shango fires straight ahead, but somehow manages to kill enemies lurking in trees. Fajardo tries to carry the film as the villain doing his best to be nasty by gunning down women and children, but these scenes are just as lazily photographed. Arguably the worst of the Django sounding titles akin to the likes of Cjamango and Garringo.

Fantastic Argoman, The / Come rubare la corona d’Inghilterra (1967)

2012-01-10T18:15:00.000-08:00

Womanizing and thieving antihero, Sir Reginald Hoover, played by Roger Browne, really brings the kid out of adult viewers when, as long as he hasn’t had sex in the last 6 hours, he instantaneously transforms into the completely infallible Argoman, sporting skintight banana colored superhero gear made goofier with an undersized red cape. Nonetheless, despite the Superman persona and the ability to levitate and capture beautiful women, via telekinesis, Argoman never flies, which ends up being a small disappointment.

The story is about as typical as they come for what feels like a spy influenced superhero movie, but criticizing aside, there’s no denying a weird charm in a movie that only wishes to entertain as long as viewers let it. Whether or not it was intentional, the faults and shortcomings in Sergio Grieco’s film manage to be its strengths, with the dumb looking hero, even dumber bad guys, and an eyesore of an evil lair, among others, ending up being a source of entertainment and memorability, in other words, a glorious embodiment of camp cinema.

Dominique Boschero does a formidable job as the arch villain, Jenabelle: Queen of the World, constantly appearing in different fantastical attire, and a certain exciting scene that has Argoman saving the day by sprinting atop a runaway train, filmed in fast motion, has a cheer-out-loud effect to it.

Jungle Holocaust / Ultimo mondo cannibale (1977)

2012-01-09T14:58:00.000-08:00

While, admittedly, a 3rd round F.A. Cup round replay against Cannibal Holocaust's Champion's League final, Deodato's Last Cannibal World is still superior exploitation fayre. The reprehensible but obligatory scenes of animal slaughter are present and correct, as are the pudding basin-style haircuts of the natives.

Lacking Holocaust's intelligence and bite, pardon the pun, this is a rather more straight-forwards jungle action picture. Star Massimo Foschi is, basically, an Amazonian Man Called Horse but the sweaty intensity and the, at times, almost baroque imagery and lush soundtrack counteract the more distasteful aspects. The subterranean cavern scene of hooting savages is reminiscent of a third-world version of Reifensthal's Triumph of the Will, with added man-on-a-rope torture.

A massive plus point is the practically naked throughout presence of Me Me Lai, gameshow hostess-to-be and cannibal film veteran. A Burmese Laura Gemser, her presence alone compensates for the graphic scenes of infanticide and full-frontal male nudity. Any subtext of civilised man versus so-called savage is smoothed away under a sea of brown nipples, swinging penises and badly matched stock footage of alligators.

Forbidden Photos of a Lady Above Suspicion, The / Le foto proibite di una signora per bene (1970)

2012-01-03T11:01:00.000-08:00

Appearing directly after Dario Argento’s internationally popular The Bird With the Crystal Plumage, Photos actually owes more to the chamber giallo instigated by the 1968 Carroll Baker vehicle The Sweet Body of Deborah. Stressing intercontinental glamour undercut with perverse sexual undertones, Photos may well be the pinnacle of this particular strand of the filone. Tightly plotted by Deborah scribe Ernesto Gastaldi, Photos plays with the concept of the amateur detective and shows us that these tropes were firmly embedded in the public’s consciousness well before the explosion of the filone.

Showcasing the female leads in a number of truly outrageous fashions, director Luciano Ercoli pours on the camp with delightful relish. Dagmar Lassander handles the descent into paranoia well, but the film truly belongs to Nieves Navarro, who has an absolute ball portraying one of the most sexually rambunctious female protagonists ever to grace a giallo. One of the most chic, sexy and purely enjoyable gialli in the history of the cannon.

Hunters of the Golden Cobra / I cacciatori del cobra d'oro (1982)

2012-01-01T16:22:00.000-08:00

The Golden Cobra, a cheap and nasty looking artifact itself hardly worthy of the adulation of tribal elder and politician, is the subject of an Indiana Jones style jungle based Where's Wally hunt for a lacquered Kaa toy. Nevertheless, the object seems to be important enough to those who seek to commission John Steiner who disappears early in the film, presumably to shoot another feature, and a David Warbeck who grimaces in the most constipated fashion through pretty much every action sequence.

The titular hunt itself is a bit of a disappointment and largely consists of a brief bus ride after which the driver self immolates, a short flight in a sea plane and a bit of a stroll on the fringes of the jungle before stumbling upon a volcano that houses the underwhelming gold effect snake.

Nevertheless this is the work of Antonio Margheriti and, unsurprisingly enough, it is directed with the utmost enthusiasm. It is the work of a man as much at home with the guns-in-the-jungle genre as he is amongst his exploding compound miniatures and volcano model.

While Indiana Jones fans are likely to be disappointed by this one lovers of Bruno Mattei's harmlessly goofy jungle actioners, Strike Commando for example, will no doubt lap this shit up.

Almanta Suska plays sisters, both of them, though not at the same time and a sweaty Luciano Pigozzi struggles with the tropical heat.

Arcana (1972)

2012-01-01T09:50:00.000-08:00

An unscrupulous fake spiritualist and her son who has the gift lead a strange oedipal home life in this barely penetrable horror drama from Giulio Questi, the man responsible for the oddest of the clones of Django.

Guerrilla film-making techniques place an unsuspecting public, studied with microscopic detail, within the action as the feature crumbles slowly but surely before, in the spirit of dialectics, it all collapses in a strange heap of machine-gun fire and discordant violin played by an unexplained wandering musician as a backstreet abortion is conducted, a dwarf delivers a dress and a donkey is winched, by rope, up the side of a house. Even the question of whether donkey teeth possess the power is left open. Nevertheless, the reaction of random members of the public to the mindbending shenanigans is, in itself, worth the price of admission.

The preamble describes the feature as a game of cards, but, if this is the case, then it is surely a game of cards played under the influence of psilocybin.

Stranger and The Gunfighter, The / El kárate, el Colt y el impostor (1974)

2011-12-31T18:59:00.000-08:00

1974 was a banner year for Shaw Brothers studio and their involvement with foreign productions particularly those from Europe. This Italy-Hong Kong produced picture was one of them. Heavily hyped in Hong Kong, it didn't perform very well there, but nonetheless remains a fascinating curio on the resume of Antonio Margheriti. It's a lively and fun show about the search for a treasure whose location is tattooed on the backsides of four prostitutes by a cheeky Chinaman, the uncle of Ho Chiang played by Lo Lieh. Ho must find Dakota, his uncles accidental killer, as only he has the clues as to the location of the buried booty. Other interested parties are after the treasure including a psychotic preacher man and his giant Indian sidekick.

The films production values are extravagant benefiting from some of the Shaw's staggeringly ornate set pieces. The one major mis-step is in the fight choreography. It's terribly lacking in excitement considering the kinetic punch of other Shaw action pictures of the time. Still, the fights do improve over the course of the picture and it's hard to not be entertained by both Van Cleef and Lo Lieh, both actors brimming with charisma. Lo Lieh dubs his own voice and he works extremely well off of Van Cleef who seems to be having a grand time and his last scene is a hoot.

There were a few other East meets Europe westerns, but this is the biggest and most sprawling of the bunch made even more impressive in that by 1974, Italian westerns weren't in vogue. Comedy is definitely in evidence here, but not the nauseating and badly choreographed silent era slapstick that dominates so many "comedy" westerns. The movie further displays its mindlessly entertaining qualities by mashing together elements of both Tessari's Don't Turn The Other Cheek, 1972 and The Good, The Bad and The Ugly, 1966. It's great fun for those in the right frame of mind and far more goofily engaging than the poverty row shenanigans of the similar Fighting Fists of Shanghai Joe, 1974.

Whisper in the Dark, A / Un Sussurro nel buio (1976)

2011-12-30T16:14:00.000-08:00

Delightful cinematography and wonderful supernatural set pieces combine to make for what could have been a classic had the film been within a structured narrative
to give form to what is, no doubt, a sympathetic telling of a ghost story.

Instead, despite creating an atmosphere that those who like titles such as Bava's Schock, The Innocents or The Changeling may find agreeable, the creepy kids in the bourgeois household meme, a la The Others, is not well served by a plot which ultimately leads nowhere.

It is a shame that despite mist, which is always creepy, a gothic setting, twin girls who speak in unison, a child's imaginary friend who may not, after all, be imaginary and lots of nocturnal creaks and bumps, what it all amounts to is a project that is far short of the film this could so easily have been.

The money shot is denied when exhaustion of every creepy kid haunted house cliché in the ghost trope book becomes the cue for the rolling of the end credits, leaving a feeling of largely chill-free perplexity in place of a conclusion.

Caligula (1979)

2011-12-29T17:02:00.000-08:00

While Edward Gibbons may quibble with the historical accuracy, Tinto Brass' epic is a full-blooded, visceral portrayal of the reign of Malcolm McDowell as Peter O' Toole murdering psychopath Caligula. The majority of the film can be seen, perhaps, as I, Claudius sans Christopher Biggins, but the insertion of several hardcore sex scenes post-production certainly add to the film's notoriety.

Looking beyond the myriad of fetishes on screen, such as lesbianism, troilism, masturbation and fellatio, the production values are surprisingly excellent, as would be expected from Fellini's production designer Danilo Donati, and the cast throw themselves into the film as only actors who have not read the entirety of the script can.

Brass himself disowned the film, despite it being little more than Salon Kitty with erections and money shots, which, in fact, are ably shot by Bob Guccione and Giancarlo Lui, and are seamlessly integrated into the film. Screenplay writer Gore Vidal would love to erase the film from the face of the earth, but any cineaste who would relish the sight of Alex the Droog fisting a bloke, or John Gielgud and Helen Mirren appearing in a hardcore porn film will, for the sake of the Senate, absolutely love this.

Great Kidnapping, The / La polizia sta a guardare (1973)

2011-12-29T09:16:00.000-08:00

There is a certain urgency to a fine soundtrack from Stelvio Cipriani,with it's echoes of that echoes that of Rabid Dogs, accompanying a brilliant kidnap themed crime thriller with strong political undertones. The ever great Enrico Maria Salerno, an uncompromising police commissioner, is forced to see things from an alternative perspective as his son becomes the latest victim of a spate of politically motivated kidnappings. Jean Sorel appears, but, along with Lee J. Cobb, has little to do here.

Genre fans will no doubt recognise plenty of familiar themes, here wonderfully realised, including the obligatory tyre shredding, wheel screeching car chase, as death defying stunt drivers take a high octane spin through the streets of Milan in the familiar green of the Alpha Romeo Giulia

A perfect double-bill companion for Bava's Rabid Dogs, it is a real pity that La polizia sta a guardare, a film that leaves, for example, Fernando Di Leo's Kidnap Syndicate in the shade, has yet to achieve the recognition of the more familiar works of Lenzi, Castellari and the other Eurocrime masters.

Case of the Bloody Iris, The / Perché quelle strane gocce di sangue sul corpo di Jennifer? (1972)

2011-12-27T03:28:00.001-08:00

Unashamedly derivative and commercial, Iris’s referential nature results in a kind of giallo greatest hits package that acts as an excellent entry point for the uninitiated. The delightful first twenty minutes manages to cram in a suspense filled murder scene, a racy photo shoot, a bizarre feminist / sadomasochistic nightclub act, a sex-cult orgy and a direct homage to Mario Bava. It’s no surprise that Iris struggles to sustain such momentum, but there’s plenty of fun to be found in the film’s later acts.

The third collaboration between Luciano Martino, Edwige Fenech and George Hilton, Iris draws heavily on the team’s previous work and the iconic status of the cast, grounded only the year previous. However, with Giuliano Carnimeo replacing Sergio Martino in the directorial chair, the film lacks a certain psychological bite and poetic sadism, and seems content to coast breezily upon previous achievements. Still, the zoom happy director invests enough energy in the project and, barring the usual interminable police procedural elements, the film is pacy enough to entertain even the most jaded of palates. Fenechphiles will certainly be delighted by the fabulous fashions, the most stylish of her career, adorning this most beloved of actresses.

Barbarella (1968)

2011-12-26T23:34:00.000-08:00

This adaptation to the French comic series, Barbarella, is one-of-a-kind and a love-it-or-hate-it, Dino De Laurentiis, production that stars Jane Fonda as a sexually liberated intergalactic spy. Barbarella’s mission, i.e. the plot, is far from what makes the film a surprisingly entertaining camp-fest, but the sole enjoyment lies in her sexually outlandish encounters with the denizens of the planet Lythion as well as a “fantastique” style with an aesthetic that brings to mind the erotic fantasy artwork of adult Sci-Fi comics.

The 1960s effects involving liquid emulsions and blue screens are easy to poke fun at, but considering the means, are nonetheless impressive and offer a wealth of entertainment for viewers willing to put forth the imagination and lay off being critical for a bit.

David Hemmings showcases his talent for deadpan humor, bringing on the laughs as the revolutionist, Dildano, and John Phillip Law’s wooden acting works favorably for his role as the blind docile angel, Pygar.

How to Kill a Judge / Perché si uccide un magistrato (1976)

2011-12-18T14:46:00.000-08:00

Only nominally a part of the poliziotteschi cycle Damiano Damiani’s How to Kill a Judge is a slow burning and low key thriller. It totally eschews the high octane thrills and spills of the form in favour of political intrigue and Mafia subterfuge. At times its sedentary pace borders on total inertia, but it becomes abundantly clear that Damiano and his collaborators are intent on articulating a serious socio/political message, and seek to explore the ideological ramifications of corruption at the highest echelons of Italian society.

The film invests a great deal of time in characterisation, and the plot is carried along by dialogue rather than action. One of the major pitfalls of films with political intent is that they can forget to be entertaining, and at times How to Kill a Judge strays perilously close to becoming too dour for its own good. This is a very overpopulated film featuring a gallery of characters that slip in and out of the narrative with confusing irregularity. The character that does anchor proceedings is played by Franco Nero, he is an investigative journalist who uses the medium of cinema in order to express his own brand of leftist anti-authoritarianism.

Nero is on inspirational form here as he attempts to extricate himself from a complex web of lies and deception amid a police investigation, pressures from the mafia and his paymasters, the need to clear his own name, and a nagging guilt over his part in the death of the magistrate. The influence of the Mafia goes to the very heart of the Sicilian legal system, and the film ends on a predictably despairing and cynical note. One must admire Damiano for his daring non-sensationalist approach to the material, but a knowledge of Sicilian culture and the Mafia’s insidious role within it, is essential to fully enjoying this intelligent thriller.

Lightning Bolt / Operazione Goldman (1966)

2011-12-11T22:59:00.001-08:00

Antonio Margheriti’s second, and last, espionage comedy fuses comic book Sci-Fi with a run-of-the-mill Eurospy plot, saving it from being what could have been a rather mediocre affair. Disappointing is when a Capt. Patricia Flanagan, played by Diana Lorys, is introduced as someone that fractured an enemy agent’s spine, suggesting the appealing idea of a kickass female lead, only to find out she is not the main superspy agent, but more of a sidekick to the heroic ass slapping protagonist Lt. Harry Sennet, played by Anthony Eisley. Sennet is not a bad superspy but nothing overtly special either, though his frequent first-person narrative voiceover and a few other quirks help him to stand out a bit amidst the sea of Bond-esque figures in the 60s.

Keeping things primarily on the fun side, Margheriti’s film is heavy on action, so much to the point of being mindless, and an underwater lair ruled by an over-the-top super villain, played by Folco Lulli, is always an entertaining inclusion. The 60s Italian genre feel is augmented with guards dressed like Diabolik, while thick blood-red liquid passing as lava surging through miniature sets makes for pleasing cheap effects.

Killer Fish (1979)

2011-12-10T06:56:00.001-08:00

Antonio Margheriti clearly has a lot of love for the jungle and for his miniatures. The exploding trains and buildings and green inferno foliage are great. The eponymous killer fish less so.

Massacre in Dinosaur Valley features a great piranha attack. Killer Fish, unfortunately, does not. It is all about bubbly red water and uninspired close ups of some fish in an aquarium doing mostly non-threatening fishy things such as swimming about, swimming about some more and trying not to bump into each other in their overstocked fish tank while autopilot cast members thrash about screaming.

What is left is little more than talky made-for-TV style thriller decked out in some pretty garish suits and oversize disco king collars. Fall Guy Lee Majors stars.

Moro Affair, The / Il caso Moro (1986)

2011-12-08T07:22:00.001-08:00

Even by Italian standards, the 1978 kidnapping and murder of the Christian Democrat President Aldo Moro, rocked the political establishment. The subsequent rumours of Governmental complicity muddied the waters considerably, and Guiseppe Ferrarra does an admirably restrained job, refusing to explicitly vent the anger that the Italian public did, and still do, feel.

A long way from El Indio, Gian Maria Volonte is suitably stoic during his 55 days of captivity, and superbly portrays the building tension behind his politician's mask. The Red Brigade terrorists are shown not as caricatures, but as actors in a larger, political structure that is as rotten as the Establishment one.

The climax is inevitable, but the slow burning feel gives a real sense of tension as the days and weeks pass. Ferrarra covered similar ground in his 2002 The Bankers of God, based on the Calvi murder/suicide case in London, and was openly hostile to the official version of events. Here, he simply presents the facts that are known and lets the viewer decide.

Puma Man, The / L'uomo puma (1980)

2011-12-06T08:03:00.001-08:00

Since The Puma Man is widely regarded as one of the worst movies ever made this can only serve to emphasise that there are clear limitations to the notion of The Wisdom of Crowds. The film is no masterpiece but it is not anywhere near as awful as some riffing puppets would have viewers believe.

Sure enough The Puma Man feels like a relic of a bygone age of cinema and features already past their sell-by date effects but this only adds to the charm of what should be regarded as a matinée style crowd pleaser along the lines of the Children's Film Foundation movies.

Watched with an open mind The Puma Man may prove to be lovable hokum complete with earnest performances from a shoulder padded leather clad Donald Pleasence, his half an Easter egg style Aztec mind control mask and a collection of waxy heads. Priceless.

So Sweet, So Dead / Rivelazioni di un maniaco sessuale al capo della squadra mobile (1972)

2011-12-05T14:32:00.001-08:00

A film that deeply divides fans of the filone, So Dead can be taken as either a nauseatingly misogynistic kill-fest or as an attack on the hypocrisy of the sexual mores of the petite bourgeois. Almost impossible to approach without heated personal opinion, it at least invokes discussion. Disregarding the controversial aspects, So Dead is a particularly dreary affair that borders on the boring. Director Roberto Bianchi Montero invests very little style and wit into the proceedings, capturing the overflow of breasts and blood in a perfunctory manner. Lurching from set piece to set piece with little finesse, the leaden, mechanical ‘plot’ exists merely as an excuse to get an incredible cast of Euro beauties, possible one of the best ever assembled for a giallo, naked before predictably dispatching them. In fact, Strip Nude For Your Killer would be a more appropriate title, but this is entirely different in tone to Andrea Bianchi’s joyfully juvenile and energetic campfest.

On the plus side, the title sequence stylishly presents a veritable checklist of iconic giallo artefacts, and the denouement does pack some emotional gravitas.

Monika / La ragazzina (1974)

2011-12-03T11:24:00.001-08:00

Monika, while looking like a typical sex comedy of the era, is probably better described as a coming of age drama. It stars Gloria Guida and it is her debut feature.

Sometimes fun, but often too creepy, the ending threatens to enter To Be Twenty territory but instead ends rather abruptly just when it seems that things are about to get going.

Miss Teenage Italy steals the show in every scene she appears but it is difficult to discern the core audience. If the film is pitched at the teen market, as with Ornella Muti vehicle Summer Affair, then it is a bit of a misfire as the parade of middle aged men leering over Ms Guida are likely to leave too many of this demographic completely weirded out. This is very much in Sins Within The Family or Blue Jeans territory.

With Gloria playing a fifteen year old schoolgirl, despite in reality being nineteen, the film can only really, on the other hand, be aimed at a certain strand of the dirty mackintosh brigade. However the drama itself is passable, the wonderful Nico Fidenco provides the score, Gloria's performance confident, the direction Mario Imperoli is that of an exploitation journeyman and, as such, gets the job done.

Great Silence, The / Il grande silenzio (1968)

2011-11-30T18:35:00.001-08:00

Brilliant and daring are just two words one could use to describe the snow caked landscape of Sergio Corbucci's merciless western picture. Truly one of the most brazen movies ever regardless of genre style, it wholeheartedly abandons cinematic conventions and burns the good guy/bad guy rule book to a cinder. Even if a stronger actor were selected for the lead role, it's doubtless this enterprise would have been anything other than co-star, Kinski's show. He dominates the movie even when he isn't onscreen. While he's silent from start to finish, Jean Louis Trintignant manages to convey sorrow and tragedy in his intermittently emotive face.

Yet this is just one indication that Corbucci is turning genre conventions upside down which he does on more than one occasion here. There's also an interracial sex scene backed by one of the most solemn scores from Ennio Morricone. The plot itself is simplicity, masked by Corbucci's marvelous eye for gloomy atmosphere and Grand Guignol theatrics. A mysterious gunfighter named Silence pursues a gang of bounty hunters who abuse the law to mask their preference for mass murder. The Great Silence is a rare picture where knowing how it ends still does not prepare the viewer for what they will see.

Easily one of the most downbeat and depressing movies of all time, its sheer defiance of popular western heritage demands classic status. Rarely has their been an oater of this type that can illicit such a visceral audience response. While not popular in many places, Corbucci's most vehement western seemingly inspired an equally bloody and violent Japanese television series entitled The Mute Samurai in 1974. While the film may leave the viewer in stunned silence when it's over, there's much to shout about regarding this Sergio Corbucci masterpiece.

Death Walks at Midnight / La morte accarezza a mezzanotte (1972)

2011-11-28T16:25:00.001-08:00

The third giallo collaboration between star Nieves Navarro and director / paramour Luciano Ercoli may appear rather routine, but is imbued with a sense of fun usually lacking in the filone. The utterly adorable Navarro holds her own as a refreshingly spunky and resourceful heroine and Simon Andreu finally proves that he can play someone other than a complete cad. As with other gialli that initially pertain toward the supernatural, the hook is discarded, replaced by a financially motivated rational that is certainly less interesting than the promise of the set-up. Featuring an interesting instrument of execution no doubt inspired by one utilised in Mario Bava’s seminal Blood and Black Lace, Midnight certainly does not skimp on the bloodier aspects of the filone, but never to the detriment of its fun fuelled atmosphere.

Ultimately driven by Navarro’s delightful charm, Midnight is a frothy excursion that successfully harks back to the playful humour of Bava’s The Girl Who Knew Too Much.

Mission Bloody Mary / Agente 077 missione Bloody Mary (1965)

2011-11-27T13:40:00.001-08:00

The first of the notable Agent 077 series, with Ken Clark as suave agent Dick Malloy, hits the mark from the start with a seductive theme song for the movie’s captivating title before bad guys start doing things that put the viewer in the mood for a heroic and unstoppable CIA agent. Without messing up his hair, Malloy searches for the whereabouts of a stolen atomic bomb, known as “The Bloody Mary”, while partaking in a gorgeously shot rooftop chase in Paris, instigating a full scale bar fight in Barcelona, and scuffling with bad guys on a freighter to Athens before going back to Paris for a fulfilling and twisty ending.

The film borrows and attempts to one-up an idea used in Thunderball that involves recognizing 2 moles on the left thigh as a distinguishing feature on a woman of importance, only in Mission Bloody Mary, Malloy must recognize them on the left breast of an insider, played by Helga Line, which is a feat that turns out to be no problem.

A familiar sight for spy film fans is the Eurasian Bond girl from Thunderball, the visually compelling Maryse Guy Mitsouko, who starred a year later in Margheriti’s spy romp Killers are Challenged, and Erika Blanc makes a brief easy to miss cameo as a Mrs. Moneypenny-esque secretary.

Special Mission Lady Chaplin / Missione speciale Lady Chaplin (1966)

2011-11-27T11:47:00.001-08:00

The Agent 077 trilogy ends on a high note with Special Mission Lady Chaplin, the most impressive and easily the best of the three. Containing the most depth, the film succeeds in being just as enjoyable as any 1960s Bond film despite the inferior imitation feel. Thankfully still starring Ken Clark, Alberto De Martino’s film is highlighted with femme fatales and pseudoscience, as a rich research foundation leader, Kobre Zoltan, played by Jacques Bergerac, implements a secretly developed ultra-light floating sponge material to raise a sunken thresher filled with Polaris missiles. Being that Zoltan is associated with a fashion organization he also manufactures the missile propellant fuel into designer cloth.

Helga Line, starring previously in Mission Bloody Mary, returns as an interested buyer of the stolen missiles and most enjoyable is the presence of From Russia with Love Bond girl, Daniela Bianchi, who is better in this film as the title character Lady Chaplin; a fashion designer and a master of disguise assassin appearing in such guises as a nun with a machine gun and an elderly lady with a firearm equipped wheelchair.

Lizard in a Woman's Skin, A / Una lucertola con la pelle di donna (1971)

2011-11-24T06:04:00.001-08:00

One of the earliest examples of the rare giallo fantastico, or gothic giallo, Lizard re-appropriates Roman Polanski’s psychosexual explorations of the ‘sick woman’ into the framework of the murder mystery. Rich with phantasmagorical imagery, Lizard allows director Lucio Fulci full reign to exploit the pathology of the unreliable narrator and finds him particularly adept at expressing the English dichotomy between repression and anarchy, embodied in a scene that contrasts Florinda Bolkan’s stifled dinner party soirées with Anita Strindberg’s orgiastic revels.

Unfortunately, the film suffers from two connected problems seemingly inherent in this particular strand of the filone, the shift away from the original audience identification figure in the final act and the abandonment of interesting psychological issues in favour of prosaic, rational motivations, resulting in an entropic effect that slows pacing to a virtual halt. Regardless, Lizard represents an original take on the giallo and abounds with extraordinary scizhodelic set pieces that are a testament to Fulci’s superlative craftsmanship.

Goliath and the Vampires / Maciste contro il vampiro (1961)

2011-11-23T01:09:00.001-08:00

This Dino De Laurentiis production directed by the man who brought the world Brennus, Enemy of Rome, 1963 and Hercules Against the Moon Men, 1964 took the reigns of this fitfully entertaining Sword and Sandal adventure that marries muscleman thrills with horror movie chills. It's long been stated that Sergio Corbucci had a hand in some of the directorial chores, but this has likewise been rebutted to Corbucci merely being on set temporarily and not participating in the making of the film. Even if he had, the movie resembles Genitlomo's style far more than anything resembling Corbucci.

The plot is no less bizarre than Gentilomo's wacky Hercules Against the Moon Men, but the results are more enjoyable here and benefit from a much more credible lead. Maciste attempts to thwart the plans of the vampiric creature Kobrak, an evil being with plans to rule the world using his army of zombie slaves. Joining Maciste is Kurtik, the mysterious leader of an even more peculiar army of blue men! Together, the two heroes battle against Kobrak to free the oppressed people of Salmanak.

De Laurentiis's involvement ensures this is one of the liveliest and action packed productions of its kind. The violence level is also high such as eye piercings, captives burned at the stake, throat slashings, women thrown to sharks and another hapless victim is thrashed with a whip while climbing a pole that's surrounded by sharp spikes. Gordon Scott impresses in a few impressively staged action sequences and even battles himself during the conclusion when Kobrak turns himself into an evil version of Maciste. Italy's homegrown hero became Goliath for the US version.

A rousing, if violent matinée entertainment.

Rings of Fear / Enigma rosso (1972)

2011-11-22T23:33:00.001-08:00

Virgin Killer is the only feature film made by director Alberto Negin, who found most of his work in television, and it is the unofficial third portion of the “schoolgirl trilogy“ started by Massimo Dallamano with his films What Have You Done To Solange and What Have They Done To Your Daughters. Negrin lacked the visual style of Dallamano, and he tries to make up for it by pumping up the sleaze factor. He succeeds by filling the movie with full frontal nudity of characters who are established to be young teens, a wicked gynecological exam, and a death that owe at least in part to a giant dildo. Even the dialog, such as when Testi’s character describes a dead girls rape to the school headmistress, complete with hand motions, comes off incredibly creepy.

The most compelling thing about Rings of Fear is how the climax of the film unfolds. Just when it seems like Testi’s Inspector has it all figured out, the rug is pulled away from both the detective and the viewer. Many gialli end with the killer being an unconnected individual who is perhaps only briefly seen, but Virgin Killer manages to keep the identity a complete surprise and still make total sense. However, the film’s ending keeps in tone with the rest of the film providing a sleazy, and disconcerting, denouement to the proceedings.

Fans of gialli, polizia, and Testi will find some things to like here, but Virgin Killer moves at a somewhat glacial pace. The sleaze takes it a long way, but after a while that fades into the background. What makes this film is the last ten minutes which will cause most viewers to look at the film’s events in a much different light.

Scientific Card Player, The / Lo scopone scientifico (1972)

2011-11-22T01:47:00.000-08:00

There are several good gambling based films, such as The Hustler and The Cincinnati Kid, but Luigi Comencini's Scopone based effort certainly isn't one of them. With a cast featuring Bette Davis, Joseph Cotten, Alberto Sordi and the glorious Silvana Mangano, one would expect fireworks on the screen. Unfortunately, despite a nicely waspish turn from Davis, anyone not interested in the Italian card game will find the interminable duel more than a little confusing.

The plot is vaguely interesting, with a poor couple deliberately throwing the regular matches with Davis, an aging millionairess, but more could have been made of the rich versus poor aspect, without resorting to 1950s style high drama. The ambiguous ending is a clever touch, and one's eyes cannot be torn away from the form of the former beauty queen, Ms. Mangano, but there is little else to recommend this.

Sicilian Checkmate / La violenza: Quinto potere (1972)

2011-11-15T09:20:00.001-08:00

Sicilian Checkmate is a courtroom procedural and Mafia exposé that, while largely set around bench, box and bar, peppers the proceedings with shotgun fire galore through occasional flashback.

Written by the Strip Nude For Your Killer wordmeister Massimo Felisatti, the resulting drama is not unlike something for which viewers would expect to find the folding chair occupied by Damiano Damiani, a director who did much to highlight, via the cinematic craft, the corrupting role of the mob upon Sicilian life. However the film is directed by Florestano Vancini.

The cast is, from the point of view of the Eurocrime enthusiast, surely one of the stronger of the genre with Enrico Maria Salerno from Late Night Trains, Riccardo Cucciolla from Rabid Dogs, henchman extraordinaire Guido Leontini, Elio Zamuto from Violent Naples with his Borat-like soup-strainer and even the wonderful Calibro 9 pairing of Mario Adorf and Gastone Moschin.

More surprising is Ciccio Ingrassia, sans hyperactive sidekick, who certainly puts in a noteworthy performance. However it is the incomparable Moschin who here pretty much rises above his fellow genre peers to steal the show in the most memorable fashion. He acts his socks off.

How We Stole the Atomic Bomb / Come rubammo la bomba atomica (1967)

2011-11-13T10:43:00.001-08:00

The film is directed by Lucio Fulci and by this period it was clear that the familiar style of the director was by now pretty much fully developed. As such this film may interest those more familiar with the director's later horror work.

Haters of Franco and Ciccio will probably not like this one as the pairing here do what they do in their usual way. Franco gurns and Ciccio is constantly exasperated. However this one is probably good enough to win over those who sit on the fence when it comes to the dozy duo and they do have some really good material to work with here.

How We Stole the Atomic Bomb works for a number of reasons. Firstly the writing. It is well written. Franco and Ciccio are on top form and when it works for them, it really does work. Secondly the Egyptian locations are interesting and captured in that distinct Lucio Fulci way.

One of the writers is long term Fulci collaborator Roberto Gianviti and another is regular Franco and Ciccio scribe Amedeo Sollazzo.

Killer Likes Candy, The / Un Killer per sua maestá (1968)

2011-11-09T18:15:00.000-08:00

CIA agent Mark Stone, played by Kerwin Mathews, has been tasked with protecting the king of Kafiristan after a recent assignation attempt in Rome by a killer that just so happens to have a quirky habit of working in style by unwrapping and popping in a chewy caramel while making a hit.

As far as archetypes go, Mark feels more like the hard-ass detective as opposed to the witty spy hero, which might be disappointing to some and a breath of fresh air to others. However, the more comical spy film playfulness is reserved for Mark’s assistant Costa, played by Venantino Venantini from The Gates of Hell.

The humorously catchy “dup da-ba-dup da-ba-dup” theme music feels like it belongs more in something like Danger!! Death Ray and ends up clashing with Mark's no-nonsense attitude, but the fight scenes, chases, and shootouts that take place in historical Italian locations like The Park of Monsters and the Vatican catacombs are still inventive and enjoyable, despite the distracting music.

An audience pleaser as well as title gratification comes when Mark stumbles upon candy wrappers left over by the killer and states “our killer likes candy”. Though, the candy loving aspect of the killer is more or less a gimmick and doesn't come off as the killer's weakness, as viewers are led to believe.

Massacre Time / Tempo di massacro (1966)

2011-11-09T17:33:00.000-08:00

Massacre Time is a keynote film in the directorial career of Lucio Fulci. From an economic point of view it was a badly needed commercial success after a series of indifferent and poorly received comedies. Thematically, it allowed Fulci his first major opportunity to explore the sadism and cruelty which would become his stock in trade in the 1970’s and 1980’s. This is exemplified by the overblown vindictiveness of a prologue which involves a man being hunted by a pack of ravening dogs in order to satisfy the sadistic lusts of Junior Scott, who is played with relish by scene stealing Nino Castelnuovo.

Franco Nero, fresh off the success of Django, never really gets going as the brother who returns to his hometown to discover it ruthlessly presided over by Junior and his aged father. His blandness in the role is highlighted by the exaggerated brilliance of George Hilton, who shifts from drunken layabout to cool eyed killer with style and panache. A brutal bullwhipping of Nero’s bland cowboy adds to the fun, as does a highly entertaining clash in a saloon between the two brothers and Scott’s thugs.

The development of a Freudian subtext between father and son, hints at incest, and a sado-masochistic relationship, gives complexity to the relationship between Junior and his father, but seems to be included simply in order to make Junior more abhorrent. It would be tempting to give Fulci the credit for Massacre Time, but the reality is the themes are much more in keeping with the concerns and preoccupations of the screenwriter Fernando Di Leo. Fulci was just along for the ride, but he made good on the promise shown here.

Eyes of Crystal / Occhi di cristallo (2004)

2011-11-08T19:30:00.000-08:00

Neo Giallo, which proves that not all is Dario Argento and Mario Bava. Made several decades after the last real decent Giallo was made, Eyes of Crystal manages to get right in there and serve up the familiar traits and red herrings associated with the genre.

A serial killer is on the loose. His modus operandi is to lop off body parts from his victims and replacing them with puppet parts. At home in the safety of his lair he’s working on the ultimate taxidermy project… Time is against him as super detective Inspettore Amaldi is tracking him down.

Several character arcs are woven into the complex narrative which all comes together neatly in the last act as all is traditionally revealed. The story Franco Ferrini wrote for director Eros Puglielli is far better than a lot of the contemporary stuff he wrote for Dario Argento, and it boggles the mind to think what Argento could have done with a source material like this.

Melissa P. (2005)

2011-11-08T19:13:00.000-08:00

Larry Clarke's Kids showed a depressing, totally unerotic picture of teenage sexual activity. Low on romance and respect, but high on degradation and squalor. Luca Guadagnino's Spanish-Italian production covers similar ground, but with a slightly glossier sheen. The titular Melissa is a shy, inexperienced teenager who, after several grubby sexual fumbles, becomes a precocious Gloria Guida type.

The transformation from virgin to whore is not entirely convincing, but Guadagnino gives the film an air of acute unhappiness that the desperate sex cannot dissipate a jot. Although of legal age at the time, star Maria Valverde looks authentically jailbait like in a series of eyebrow raising scenes, especially the sequence set during a P.E. lesson. Veteran actress Geraldine Chaplin gives a strong performance as Melissa's grandmother, the only person who truly understands the troubled young girl. When granny is retired off to a rest home, Melissa's situation rapidly degenerates.

Not a classic by any means, but a jolting opening scene, youthful cast and nicely downcast cinematography provide an interesting contrast to the usual teenage sexual high jinks.

Suspects, The / La polizia indaga: siamo tutti sospettati (1974)

2011-11-08T16:33:00.000-08:00

The discovery of a body, that of a young American played by Mimsy Farmer, is the cue for the retelling of her final days in flashback as revealed by the murder suspects in this verbose procedural.

While all the expected elements including a gendarme search party, wall charts galore, some lab work and even the obligatory police frogmen may amuse fans of the procedure heavy the whole affair is largely a little too pedestrian for it's own good and unlikely to compel repeat viewing beyond initial curiosity satisfaction.

Giallo lovers may get something from some of the twists and turns as the evidence is presented but fans of political thriller on the other hand are likely to be disappointed as, when an opportunity for such intrigue is hinted at, the idea is not really explored in anything more than in a superficial way.

Le mataf / Tre per una grande rapina (1973)

2011-11-07T18:57:00.000-08:00

Eurocrime at it's most gritty and gripping Le mataf features pretty much everything required to push all the right buttons for the genre enthusiast. A French and Italian co-production it is stylistically similar to the more familiar poliziotteschi yet largely eschews the genre typical set piece and instead is a far more understated affair.

Delightful urban and industrial location work compliment an engrossing heist movie that twists and turns without going as far off the wall as the more familiar caper type approach to the genre with films such as Grand Slam or Le casse.

The musical score, provided by Stelvio Cipriani, is used sparingly yet effectively and this, along with a slightly different pacing and aesthetic, contributes to something that has an ever so slightly different feel to the more familiar Italian Eurocrime favourites. Nevertheless this is a must see for the initiated and could easily rank amongst the finest of the genre.

Le mataf is directed by Serge Leroy and stars Michel Constantin and Adolfo Celi.

From the Orient with Fury / Agente 077 dall’oriente con furore (1965)

2011-11-07T05:18:00.000-08:00

The Agent 077 series consists of some of the most prominent Italian Spy films and in this addition CIA Agent Dick Malloy, played by Ken Clark, travels over Istanbul, Paris, and Madrid to uncover the kidnapping of a Professor Kurtz and recover his notes on a disintegration ray invention.

The film is relatively easy to follow, but feels a little overdrawn out given its simple premise. Nonetheless, the requisite Bond girl imitators, among them Margaret Lee of Asylum Erotica, and the curious small gadgets, like a lighter that fires poison needles, are easily enough to pique viewer's interest, while Fernando Sancho’s cameo enhances the bar fight to a hysterically entertaining level.

The best comedic element is the main villain's henchmen, who are always after the agent, but the joke is usually on them as Malloy confidently thwarts and toys with his assassins, knowing full well that they are just too stupid to kill him. Malloy is tough, funny, elegant, and as to be expected, never one to miss an opportunity to get laid on the job.

Corleone (1978)

2011-11-06T13:04:00.000-08:00

Also known as Father of the Godfathers this Pasquale Squitieri directed period mob movie charts the rise of a mafia boss played by Giuliano Gemma. While it is clear what is attempted here is an admirable shot at a decade spanning gangster epic, and this is successful enough from a directorial point of view, the material here is clearly far too lightweight and predictable to make this anything more than a mild diversion. It is a pity really, for this could have added up to much more, but instead is merely Godfather-lite.

A far better option would be either Day of the Owl or I Kiss the Hand.

San Babila-8 P.M. / San Babila ore 20 un delitto inutile (1977)

2011-11-06T10:03:00.000-08:00

Carlo Lizzani captures the streets of Milan with a documentary-like styling in this tale of the a group of neonazi teenagers and the dynamics of the group in a world seemingly populated entirely with those from the political fringes.

Communist demonstrations are shown and the police are portrayed as inconsequential as larger than life caricatures duke it out for control of the streets for ideologies which are not really explored in any meaningful way, thus rendering the explosive Gladio era political climate as little more than a gang turf war as the plod stand idly by.

While the plot itself is a little threadbare Lizzani makes the enterprise interesting with guerrilla film making techniques giving a wonderful feel for both time and place. This, as a strength, does far outweigh any downside and the film does at least attempt to contextualize a little more than some of the other nihilist wayward violent youth movies that came out of Italy around this time.

Night of the Doomed / Amanti d'oltretomba (1965)

2011-11-02T08:28:00.000-07:00

Thanks to Black Sunday and The Long Hair of Death, the presence of Barbara Steele in dual roles as nice girl and sinister doppelgänger had become something of a miniature sub-genre of its own by the time this splendid effort from peplum specialist Mario Caiano came around. The actress is fantastic in both roles, but it is her appearance as the vengeful ghost of Muriel at the film's climax that endures as the most iconic. The minuscule but perfectly formed cast also includes Eurocult faves Paul Muller and Helga Liné as the scheming lovers who plot to drive Barbara-in-blonde-wig insane, before upping the stakes to more murder.

Great location work, superbly crisp black and white photography from Enzo Barboni and a powerfully melodramatic score from maestro Morricone, his first in the horror genre, inject a huge dose of atmosphere into a tale bookended by acts of shocking violence. That the plot is full of holes is of little consequence to the overall effect. Equally well known as Nightmare Castle and The Faceless Monster, the film easily ranks as one of the best of the non-Bava 60s Gothics, but beware of hideously truncated versions clocking in below 100 minutes.

Tales of Ordinary Madness / Storie di ordniaria follia (1981)

2011-11-02T08:23:00.000-07:00

The gritty portrayal of a Charles Bukowski-ish character who hooks up with hooker in a series of drunken, sex driven encounters. Falling off the wagon, drunken pessimist Charles Serking, Ben Gazzara, buggers off from his regular gig as university lecturer, and takes a road trip to Los Angeles.

Along the way he works his way into the pants of every woman he meets. Until he meets Cass, Ornella Muti, a delightful hooker with whom he falls head over heels in love with.

One would think that the combination of Bukowski’s written decadence along side the provocative imagery of Marco Ferreri would have made a bigger impact considering the style of his other work. Instead he plays it safe and the movie tends to focus more on the self-destruction of Serking and Cass more than relying on strange scenes and wild moments.

Cinematographer Tonino Delli Colli, yes, the bloke married to Alexandra “New York Ripper and Zombie Holocaust” Delli Colli, won several awards for his work on the movie and Gazzara gives the performance of a lifetime.

Hitch-Hike / Autostop rosso sangue (1977)

2011-10-31T01:33:00.000-07:00

Hitch-Hike has traditionally remained the most obscure and least seen of David Hess’s trilogy of psycho-sadist performances. This is an aberration that deserves to be addressed, because Pasquale Festa Campanile’s stylish and entertaining road movie is far superior to either The Last House on the Left or The House on the Edge of the Park. In its own way it is equally sadistic, but much of the cruelty is delivered through merciless dialogue exchanged by a bickering couple played by Franco Nero and Corrine Cléry. Nero is at his boorish and loutish best, clearly having a whale of a time demeaning and humiliating his beautiful wife. His character has endured a dark descent into emasculation and he explodes with bitter resentfulness at the least provocation.

The arrival of a gun toting escaped lunatic/bank robber/murderer in the shape of Hess adds further tensions and pressures to the simmering atmosphere in the car. The beautiful Italian countryside, doubling for Northern California, sweeps past outside, offering an ironic spatial counterpoint to the claustrophobia and restriction of the vehicle. A controversial and problematic rape scene offers a surprising shift in tone, but is still mesmerising thanks to Ennio Morricone’s insistent music. Although there are several plot twists, the cynicism of the finale seems a little forced, and is one of very few missteps in an otherwise engaging and stylistically coherent thriller.

Gospel According to St. Matthew, The / Il Vangelo secondo Matteo (1964)

2011-10-30T08:36:00.000-07:00

A Marxist, homosexual atheist is a potent combination, and the works of Pier Paolo Pasolini are frequently as thought provoking and problematic. Pasolini's lack of belief in the divinity of Christ allowed him to present a more authentic, and perhaps class-conscious, account of Matthew's gospel than previous, more sanctimonious efforts.

Stunning, harsh cinematography, often filming into the sun, and simple shot composition outweigh the variable acting standards of the mainly amateur cast. Then non-actor Enrique Irazoqui is an atypical, human Jesus, seen slogging around a dusty, arid Palestine. By avoiding the usual cliqued Renaissance-type imagery, Pasolini gives us a more accessible figure, closer to the working men and women who made up his flock in the early days.

The miracles are dealt with in an offhand way, which would be mirrored decades later in Scorsese's Last Temptation of Christ, and even the voice of Yaweh Himself appears without Cecil B. DeMille-style fanfare.

Matthew is a rare beast: a religious film which can be enjoyed artistically by the secular and devotionally by the churchly.

Samson and the Sea Beasts / Sansone contro i pirati (1963)

2011-10-23T12:26:00.000-07:00

Another teaming of Boccia and Morris also adds Malatesta among the credits to bring together the three least charismatic and talented among the peplum/fusto canon. This terrible trifecta manages to make a pirate adventure a boring affair even with an impressive fleet of ships at the productions disposal. The plot is virtually non-existent as Samson attempts to thwart the rampaging Murad, ruler of Devil's Island and a villainous pirate who partakes in the sinking of ships, amassing stolen riches and selling captured women in slave auctions.

With a story like that, the viewer should expect buckles to get a proper swash. Sadly, what little action there is consists of a sequence where Samson is forced to avoid impalement by pulling a ship manned by a dozen men and another scene that sees our less than stoic hero battle it out with an immobile alligator prop. Morris's female fans will be pleased to know that he remains shirtless through the bulk of the film and even does that sucking in of his gut he was "famous" for to make his chest poke out more prominently.

Margaret Lee is gorgeous here and the true highlight of the film. Thank goodness she gets a load of screen time that's worth a pirate's booty. Her eyes and that luscious smirk of hers are in abundance here and that alone makes the film worth a viewing. Also, the films score by Angelo Francesco Lavagnino is stupendous and you'll likely be humming the main theme during and after the films end. This score definitely deserved a much better movie instead of the unimaginative one Guido Malatesta wrote for it. Incidentally, there are far better pirate-peplum amalgamations such as the action oriented Hercules and the Black Pirate, 1964, with Sergio Ciani and also the pseudo historical Julius Caesar Against the Pirates, 1962 with a scene devouring Gordon Mitchell.

Etruscan Kills Again, The / L'etrusco uccide ancora (1972)

2011-10-23T06:58:00.000-07:00

Directed by Armando Crispino, The Dead Are Alive is a very unique giallo experience that at first plays as a supernatural horror film but then spirals into a atmospherically charged and graphic giallo masterpiece. Even though the body count is marginally low, the murders are grisly, graphic and very bloody, similar to that of an 80's slasher with a fair amount of sleaze added, as one would expect.

The locales are amazing. The ruins shown are delightfully eerie and macabre, dank, gloomy, sinister and intriguing thus giving weight to the films first impression of being that of a normal supernatural horror film, rather than the giallo it is.

Alex Cord and Samantha Eggar both give solid enough performances if not outstanding, and Riz Ortolani composes a largely dark and powerfully rendered operatic score which creates great suspense and a feeling of overall dread.

Seven Murders for Scotland Yard / Jack el destripador de Londres(1971)

2011-10-23T02:07:00.000-07:00

This Sitges film festival award winning murder mystery, written by and starring the genre versatile Paul Naschy, is not a full blooded Italian giallo, but could easily fit in with Sergio Martino or Umberto Lenzi thrillers of the era.

Naschy plays a heavily drinking and crippled ex-trapeze artist, Pedro Dorian, who makes for an entertaining lead and red herring along with a small number of other suspects who could possibly be the killer with black gloves and black loafers mimicking the murder habits as in the case of Jack the Ripper. This premise should give viewers an idea of what to expect which primarily concerns a lot of bickering between Scotland Yard denizens and no shortage of violent murder scenes involving semi-nude prostitutes, among others. Definite highlights include a stumbling drunken Naschy as well as several good old fashioned fist fights.

A montage style recap of the murder victims at the end reveals that there were in fact eight murdered women in the movie which goes to show that “seven” must be thought of as a very marketable number to use in a giallo title.

Big Feast, The / La Grande Bouffe (1973)

2011-10-20T17:54:00.000-07:00

French-Italian co-production directed by Marco Ferreri sees four friends, Masterchef Ugo, Ugo Tognazzi, upperclass lawyer Philippe, Phillipe Noiret, and randy aeroplane pilot Marcello, Marcello Mastroianni gather at a large villa to engage in a final grand feast with the intention of eating themselves to death! Along the way, Marcello brings in three whores as he need’s to shag every day, and Philippe meets schoolteacher Andrea, Andréa Ferréol, who is exactly the kind of woman he’s been looking for his whole life.

A movie that repulsed Ingrid Bergman when it opened the Cannes film festival in 1973, but nevertheless was nominated for a Palme d’Or and won the international federation of film critics award at the same festival.

Once a grotesque, perverted and completely fascinating exhibition of decadence, it’s obviously nowhere near as provocative as it may have been almost forty years ago, but still makes for a highly entertaining and enjoyable movie.

Zombie 5: Killing Birds / Uccelli assassini (1988)

2011-10-18T18:11:00.000-07:00

The words 'Produced by Joe D'Amato' may put off all but the hardiest of viewers, but laying good taste to one side, there are a few moments which drag this film from the bargain bin. After an arresting beginning

which features a multiple murder and a Hitchcock-style bird attack, the pace slows considerable upon the arrival of a group of zombie fodder students.

The woodpecker-seeking students soon get whittled down, Tenebrae's Lara Wendel tries not to look embarrassed, and to top it off, Napoleon Solo himself wanders around, perhaps looking for his agent's phone number. The zombie effects are a little shoddy, and only Wendel puts in any acting effort, but the storyline is amusingly bizarre and the swamp setting is suitably grimy.

There are many worse Zombie films out there, and Killing Birds is at least amusing, if unintentionally so. Director Claudio Lattanzi moves his cast around in a workman like way, and makes for a painless, if uninspiring, hour and a half.

Etoile (1989)

2011-10-17T12:20:00.000-07:00

When Jennifer Connelly arrives from America at a ballet school it seems that Étoile is going down the road of an Argento homage but instead charts it's own course as a Shining-like supernatural tale set around a long past production of Swan Lake.

The ballet sequences are pleasant enough viewing and the use of Budapest locations make for something a little out of the ordinary. Though this is certainly no Argento and in execution is more like the Christopher Reeve time travel romance Somewhere in Time than Suspiria.

This is a hard film to especially recommend as, although it is all interesting enough for what it is, it is unlikely to top many people's all time best horror list. It is nevertheless probably worth a look, at least once, if only to satisfy curiosity.

Seven Red Berets / Sette baschi rossi (1969)

2011-10-17T10:02:00.000-07:00

Featuring an anti colonial message and some delightful location work there is also plenty of battle action for the more action oriented Italian war movie enthusiast.

Though this is a combat film concerning mercenaries in Congo there is a strong jungle adventure element that is not dissimilar from the cannibal genre and a number of scenes are not unlike moments in Cannibal Holocaust including, among other similarities, a woman on a stake, the rape of a female member of the ensemble as a village is razed to the ground and an opening aerial shot following a river.

Ivan Rassimov, a man who spent plenty of time in the following decade wandering about jungles in the name of disreputable cinema entertainment, takes the lead role in this feature and to emphasize the cannibal film connection a snake is sacrificed, needlessly, to the altar of authenticity.

Return of Sabata / È tornato Sabata... hai chiuso un'altra volta (1971)

2011-10-17T07:54:00.000-07:00

Sabata returns with Lee Van Cleef in the lead role and this time there is an attempt to do more with the film. More acrobatics, more comedy. Unfortunately sometimes less is more and the slapstick here feels a little laboured.

That is not to say the film is all bad. Some of the original cast return, and similar themes to the original are revisited. It just could have done with turning things down a notch or two. The film is simply far too hyperactive for it's own good.

Sabata / Ehi amico... c'è Sabata, hai chiuso! (1969)

2011-10-16T18:41:00.000-07:00

A stranger comes to town, the rich villain in his compound and the greedy betrayals. None of this is especially original for Italian westerns, after all this is standard genre fare as is the class political subtext.

On the other hand it is the custom weapons, devious traps and mute acrobatics that make Sabata such an enjoyable feature and not just these things. There is the cool as ice performance from Lee Van Cleef, the unrelenting pace and the sheer sense of fun that comes across in pretty much every scene.

Bad guy Franco Ressel, who is seen reading a book by slavery supporting Thomas Dew, wields a knife launching cane and William Berger carries a banjo gun, itself a fine piece of musical ordnance. The result is mayhem, but in a good kind of way.

Ator the Invincible 2 / Ator l'invincibile 2 (1984)

2011-10-16T16:02:00.000-07:00

Somebody, Joe D'amato probably, came to the decision that what the world needed was a sequel to Ator the Invincible. However that certain someone, Joe D'amato probably, was wrong. Nevertheless, having taken the decision to make a sequel, this created an opportunity to improve on the original movie. This did not happen, in fact the film is, to say the least, a major step backwards for the fantasy muscle-man franchise.

Ator l'invincibile 2 features a hang glider, a clip from Where Eagles Dare and some stock footage of a nuclear explosion.

Miles O'Keeffe is complicit in this crime against cinema and the film ends with a monologue about world peace, or something, that is reminiscent of the lyrics to the Dangermouse theme song. Risible.

Killer Cop / La polizia ha le mani legate (1975)

2011-10-16T13:46:00.000-07:00

Luciano Ercoli, a director no doubt familiar to giallo fans, brings the world a procedure heavy crime film that capture the political concerns of the day including terrorism, political extremism and corruption.

Possibly more comparable to the work of Damiani than to Lenzi or Di Leo the ultimate appeal of this film will no doubt be to those with more of an interest in process and investigation rather than car chases and gun battles.

This is not to say that Killer Cop is completely devoid of action. There are indeed action sequences including a number of bombings. However action is used sparingly and not used as an alternative to a good strong story.

The Stelvio Cipriani score is perfect for the genre and at times reminiscent of the music for Bava's Rabid Dogs.

Red Coat / Giubbe rosse (1975)

2011-10-16T11:17:00.000-07:00

While it is often the case that westerns set in a snowy landscape are interesting this manhunt movie from sleaze and exploitation maestro Joe D'amato is little better than pedestrian.

Mostly of interest for the costuming as a Canadian mountie movie, the film stars Four of the Apocalypse pairing of Fabio Testi and Lynne Frederick.

Exhibitionist, The / Candido erotico (1978)

2011-10-16T08:08:00.000-07:00

Candido erotico is largely set in Copenhagen. On the surface it is little but a slice of Euro sexploitation as a sex club performer falls for a young art student. However, scratch beneath the veneer and there is a decent, touching and somewhat tragic love story.

Serious points are made about voyeurism and exhibitionism and consideration is given to what happens when two people clearly love each other but, through no fault of their own, are unable to quite connect sexually.

The sex club scenes are a little bizarre and entail nude Swan Lake type ballet performances that culminate in copulation. They are well choreographed, beautifully realised, tastefully shot but unfortunately unconvincing as the population of the stage seem to outnumber the audience suggesting a lack of commercial viability.

Ajita Wilson appears briefly but top billing goes to Lilli Carati, who is great in this, and would next appear in Fernando Di Leo's exploitation classic To Be Twenty.

The Nico Fidenco score features the theme song to Emanuelle and the Last Cannibals and the saxophone opening to The Devil's Honey.

Kidnap / Fatevi vivi: la polizia non interverrà (1974)

2011-10-14T17:44:00.000-07:00

Very much Eurocrime-by-numbers Kidnap has the feel of an Umberto Lenzi feature, Almost Human in particular, as a trenchcoated Henry Silva attempts to rescue the captive young daughter of wealthy industrialist who has been held hostage, on a barge, by a desperate gang of criminals.

Prolific character actor Paul Muller makes a brief appearance as does Franco Diogene, a man who giallo fans may particularly remember as meeting his demise while in possession of his inflatable lover in a certain Andrea Bianchi sleazefest.

While Kidnap cannot really be considered a genre classic, Giovanni Fago, a director who largely made a career in television, here delivers everything that fans of the grittier end of the genre should expect to find in such a film.

Libertine, The / La matriarca (1968)

2011-10-14T14:59:00.000-07:00

Internationally distributed by Radley Metzger's Audubon Films the sexy and fun La matriarca is a charming slice of late 60s European erotica that fans of golden age Jess Franco or titles such as The Lickerish Quartet and Femina ridens should find agreeable.

Featuring a delightful,quirky, Bossa Nova soundtrack provided by composer Armando Trovajoli the The Libertine sees Mimi, Catherine Spaak, recently widowed to an unfaithful husband, embark on a sexual odyssey of discovery.

The litany of cuckolds, fetishists and the occasional oddball stalker that fall for the charms of dear Mimi reads like a who's who of Eurocult goodness as Pasquale Festa Campanile, who would later go on to work with the late great David Hess in the wonderful Autostop rosso sangue, here directs, among others, Jean-Louis Trintignant, Luigi Pistilli, Vittorio Caprioli, Philippe Leroy and Frank Wolff.

As would be expected from the genre the movie features funky fashions, cool retro futurist apartments and the occasional strategically placed J and B bottle with label facing forward into camera of course.

Bermuda Triangle, The (1978)

2011-10-14T10:59:00.000-07:00

Gloria Guida is in this but has little screen time. For three quarters of the movie Gloria is in a coma and then opens her eyes briefly. Then Gloria dies. Justerini and Brooks have more screen time, are equally immobile and yet get far more camera close-up love.

René Cardona Jr. directs the film and it is far too long, a bit of a mess and there is far too much talking about nothing. It does get better in the final quarter where a supernatural doll possesion subplot comes to the fore giving the film a bit of a Gates of Hell Trilogy feel. However it is all too little, too late.

The Oscar for inane dialogue has to be awarded to hairy heartthrob Hugo Stiglitz and he delivers with such conviction too! It all has something to do with the Bermuda Triangle apparently. What exactly, however, is not so clear but the title suggests this is indeed the case.

Features some nice underwater footage but it is a pity so many sharks had to die to make this nonsense.

Wild Eye, The / L'occhio selvaggio (1967)

2011-10-14T05:27:00.000-07:00

Dramatising the world of the Mondo filmmaker The Wild Eye is clearly a work of introspection and reflection on the part of Mondo cane director Paolo Cavara.

While the film can be seen as an attack or criticism of the genre and the personalities involved the Jacopetti type lead character, played by the ever delightful Philippe Leroy, is one with which the viewer can empathise for no matter how heartless or sociopathic he appears he is little more than a husk of a man seemingly capable of only cold utilitarian, but not emotional, situation responses.

It could be argued that in this instance the director character is in no way the villain of the piece as he is incapable of expressing natural human emotion in his quest for the next slice of shockumentary footage or a Buddhist monk willing to self-immolate on cue for a sensation hungry audience. Colleagues, despite knowing that there is something clearly amiss, stick around as long as they are paid.

Gabriele Tinti and Delia Boccardo co-star in this fascinating, tragic and enlightening work from a director who is not afraid to honestly and critically re-appraise his role in the infamous documentary genre.

008: Operation Exterminate / A 008, operazione Sterminio (1965)

2011-10-13T17:28:00.000-07:00

The plot is wafer thin. This should not really matter too much as the story, which concerns the tracking down of an anti-radar, is little more than a frame on which to hang a series of confrontations with enemy agents set against delightful scenery and involving pistols, gadgets and karate chops. An anti-radar, so it transpires, turns out to be some sort of frosted glass ball that glows and is not dissimilar to the passive alien in Dark Star.

The film, directed by Umberto Lenzi, features a female Bond figure of a lead. 008, armed with a tear gas dispensing lipstick, is played by Ingrid Schoeller and she has a male sidekick. This gender role reversal in itself sets the film apart from so many entries to the genre but the original point of reference and obvious influence is underscored as the camera homes in on a copy of Live and Let Die by Ian Flemming. This is, after all, an exploitation of the the themes of the 007 series of movies.

Mod fashion, breathtaking Egyptian and Alpine vistas and a villain who fires daggers from a prosthetic hand are just some of the delights in store. A couple of frankly crackers head-scratching twist and turns in the final minutes subvert the predictable linear narrative and add further interest to this superior Eurospy outing.

Eagles Over London / La battaglia d'Inghilterra (1969)

2011-10-13T13:33:00.000-07:00

Enzo G. Castellari's ambitious Eagles Over London opens with a number of vast set pieces that suggest a considerable budget for this attempt at a war epic. Spanning the period between the Dunkirk evacuation and The Battle of Britain some decent minatures and period detail is used to recreate the London of 1940 in this largely espionage themed combat movie.

Split screen is used creatively while reconstruction and wartime stock footage blend as Castellari infuses the plot with over the top fist and gunplay with which fans of his crime movies will no doubt feel comfortable and even finds time to include moments of light comic relief and the occasional romance.

While there will no doubt be goofs in the rendering of the historic setting, such as crates of Watney Mann at a pub, there is, nevertheless, a serious attempt at capturing the times. There is plenty here for fans of war movies or DC Thomson's pocket Commando comics to enjoy.

Satanic / Satanik (1968)

2011-10-11T08:20:00.000-07:00

Satanic is a difficult to classify film that is an adaptation to a long lived Italian comic book series of the same name and stars Magda Konopka who comes off here as sort of a poor man’s Marisa Mell, especially when she’s donning a banged blonde wig. The fact that there is very little backstory suggests that the filmmakers assumed viewers were already familiar with the hideously disfigured Dr. Marny Bannister who after killing her colleague and drinking a cell rejuvenating formula, utilizes her temporary new miraculously good looks to commit crimes while a hopeless police inspector, who seems completely incapable of putting two and two together, tries to solve her string of murders.

The film sort of works as its own take on The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde and Konopka does deliver a good deal of memorability with a tribute to Diabolik in the form of a sexy and scintillating striptease. However, era specific sensationalism and trendiness stands out more than storyline content, and for that Satanic becomes difficult to recommend to the casual filmgoer, but more to fans of vintage Eurotrash of the more obscure type.

In the Highest of Skies / Nel più alto dei cieli (1977)

2011-10-07T12:43:00.000-07:00

When some nuns, a priest, some children, a trade unionist, a communist and assorted others get trapped in an Vatican elevator it could be the start of a disaster movie and it is. Sort of. Salo type points are maybe made concerning the depravity of fascism, in this instance the clerical variety, then again the whole thing is so berserk that possibly this isn't the central theme at all. It is hard to tell.

Almost everyone ends up shagging and in this sense the film is similar to Troma's First Turn On without the funnies but, with a number of killings, a cannibalism theme points to possibly the closest film to this one; René Cardona Jr's Cyclone.

The final scenes suggest that the film is going to turn all Jacob's Ladder but instead the cast simply step out of the elevator and meet the pontiff. No one is dead, no one has bashed uglies with anyone else, the priest has no longer got it on with the little girl, no one is smeared in shit or blood and the elevator seems, despite ninety minutes or so of demolition, to return to a fine state of repair. The movie ends with a kind of choral approximation to Shivers by The Boys Next Door.

Snuff Trap / Snuff killer - La morte in diretta (2003)

2011-10-07T09:56:00.000-07:00

Step aside 8mm, move over Tesis, Bruno Mattei is on the snuff case and tackling the deadly world of the dark underbelly of the adult entertainment industry with straight to video flair and a seedy dwarf, himself a bit of a mini-me dead ringer for Minty in Eastenders, who takes the art of Killing For Culture very seriously.

More torture themed than actual torture porn the film itself is silly and great fun for both all the right and wrong reasons. Far from being shocked the viewer may find the effect of the actual money shot is to smile along with the daftness of it all rather than recoil in the intended horror.

At a time when many of the exploitation filmmakers of the golden age had either shuffled from this mortal coil, or simply folded up their director chair for the last time in the wake of the ascent of television and the age of the Italian romcom, dear Bruno just kept going and going until the very end and the world of cinema of dubious taste and quality was all the richer for it.

Sod Hostel, this is better.

Hansel and Gretel / Hansel e Gretel (1990)

2011-10-03T11:41:00.000-07:00

As part of the much maligned Lucio Fulci Presents series of low budget horror movies viewers should not expect special effects on par with American Werewolf in London or The Thing but Hansel e Gretel does deliver bucketloads of the red stuff in it's own cheap and cheery way as director Giovanni Simonelli and possibly an uncredited Lucio Fulci make the best of the resources available.

Children who are killed at the hands of organ harvesters return from beyond the grave to seek revenge which consists of singing a nursery rhyme while a red filtered torch lights up their eye sockets as nasty things happen to the offending party.

The film, in a nutshell, is a time wasting revenge movie through which favourites Maurice Poli and Paul Muller stroll on autopilot to the sounds of dated synth and cherubic acapella. Not as bad as haters suggest, yet, no way can it be considered a Eurocult horror classic.

Two Escape from Sing Sing / I due evasi di Sing Sing (1964)

2011-10-02T12:43:00.000-07:00

At times ever so slightly subversive I due evasi di Sing Sing begins with the brave, or possibly foolish, decision to play for jokes in the gas chamber of Death Row and despite the escape suggested in the title is largely made up of a pre-incarceration flashback tale. Blackface is donned for a skit that takes a swipe at segregation and the death penalty is criticised as our hapless heroes Franco and Ciccio are proved innocent after an aborted attempt to put them to death.

Some of the visual humour works well, especially a scene in which Franco Franchi takes part in boxing training after hiding a weighty hoard of coins in his glove.

Lucio Fulci fans who would like to explore his earlier work may wish to track down this title but the usual divide between Franco and Ciccio fans and detractors will no doubt apply and this particular title is unlikely to win many converts from either camp.

Fans of vintage top shelf erotic magazines should note that Parade cover-girl Claire Gordon puts in a brief appearance as a moll.

Bird With The Crystal Plumage, The / L'uccello dalle piume di cristallo (1970)

2011-09-30T22:04:00.001-07:00

American writer Sam Dalmas, Tony Musante, witnesses a failed murder attempt inside an art gallery when he becomes trapped between two large glass doors. The police believe the attacker to be the same person responsible for a recent series of murders in Rome. Dalmas assists in the investigation, troubled by the idea that he may have unknowingly witnessed an important clue, as the killer begins to target both him and girlfriend Suzy Kendall.

Dario Argento’s directorial debut is an extremely impressive and suspenseful giallo which influenced more than a few genre films made in its wake. Many elements from this film would reappear in later Argento works, such as the importance of memory in decoding clues, the foreign protagonist who is forced into the role of amateur detective, dangerous artwork, subjective point of view shots, violent set pieces, and a black-gloved killer wearing a dark raincoat.

With a haunting and unnerving score by Ennio Morricone, stylish cinematography by Vittorio Storaro, and excellent performances by Musante and Kendall, Bird is an effective thriller which is essential viewing for Argento fans as well as those who are fond of the giallo.

Stay as You Are / Così come sei (1978)

2011-09-28T17:59:00.000-07:00

Still affecting in middle age, Marcello Mastroianni stars as an unhappilly married man who may, or may not, be sleeping with his daughter. Perhaps, as she is played by Natassia Kinski as a seething cauldron of passion, he can be excused. Director Alberto Lattuada avoids the obvious pitfalls of what could have been a one note story, and the possible incest angle is almost secondary to the portrayal of a flawed, troubled man.

The juxtaposition of Mastroianni's daughter and his lover is hardly subtle, and Kinski's need of a father figure is clumsily signposted, but the quality of the cast just about compensate. The two stars are excellent, and it is a real pity that Kinski's subsequent career never took off as much as it should. While coming at the tail end of his film making days, Lattuada's direction is not in the least exploitative, and supplies a sheen to what very easily could have been an 'issue' film.

Kings of Crime / Romanzo criminale (2005)

2011-09-25T14:38:00.000-07:00

A little bit Once Upon a Time in America and a little bit Goodfellas the 1970s set Kings of Crime tells the story of the rise of a group of friends who take control of the criminal underworld in Rome. Touching on the political climate of the era both the murder of Aldo Moro and the bombing of the Bologna station, here rendered in a below average CGI explosion, are touched upon and the link between organised crime and both the overt and covert state are suggested.

While the turbulent cold war era political climate receives a reasonable overview the themes have been better handled, unsurprisingly, by both crime and political thrillers from the decade itself and the film adds little new information to the understanding of the times.

Nevertheless the more contemporary cinematic styling does add a certain urgency to the gun-play even if the movie lacks some of the more dramatic car chase moments of it's 1970s genre equivalents. However Romanzo criminale represents a welcome return to a bygone genre and the result is one more akin to an up to date Damiani film than the more action oriented work of Lenzi or Castellari.

During the golden age of Eurocrime director Michele Placido starred in titles such as The Black Hand and Oedipus orca among a host of other genre favourites.

Queens of Evil / Il delitto del diavolo (1970)

2011-09-25T09:54:00.000-07:00

Those who love giallo and erotic cinema of Europe from the late 60s and early 70s will love an agreeable aesthetic that should also get fans of slightly askew off-kilter horror such as Baba Yaga, Lisa and the Devil or even The Devil's Nightmare and it's ilk bouncing with excitement.

Motorcycles, Kaftans and sexy actresses as bewitching succubi in oversized curly wigs are the order of the day in movie that is not thematically a million miles away from Jean Rollin's Fascination albeit sans vampirism.

Sexy and sassy with a delicious undercurrent of menace Queens of Evil makes pertinent points about the conservative nature of the establishment and the threat represented by the free spirit of the counterculture by wrapping a conspiracy that pre-empts Short Night of Glass Dolls amongst a dreamt fairy tale like supernatural tale of erotic temptation. Director Tonino Cervi later strayed into similar twisted conspiratorial territory as producer of the delightful Spider Labyrinth.

Starring Ray Lovelock, Evelyn Stewart and beautiful Interrabang star Haydée Politoff, while featuring Eurocrime favourite Guido Alberti, Queens of Evil is recommended without reservation or qualification.

Lucky the Inscrutable / Agente Speciale L.K. (1967)

2011-09-20T23:45:00.000-07:00

Long before there was Austin Powers, there was Lucky the Inscrutable.

Released on the heels of Casino Royale, Jess Franco’s satirical spy comedy stars Ray Danton as a comic hero who doesn’t disappoint. Franco’s film manages to somehow be worth the 90 minutes of viewer’s time despite initial reluctance that most are sure to feel going in. Bruno Nicolai’s score is eyebrow-raising, but still ends up being appropriately jiving and very hard to resist dancing to.

Never a dull moment, Lucky the Inscrutable features a cameo from Rosalba Neri as well as an outlandish ending that is a punchline to a joke of a movie that’s aware of how ridiculous it is and seems to be proud of it.

Duel of the Titans / Romolo e Remo (1961)

2011-09-19T23:54:00.000-07:00

This spectacular adventure movie is one of the signature examples of the Sword and Sandal genre. The film is notable for bringing together the two towering titans of the genre, Steve Reeves and Gordon Scott. Both men had healthy careers that mirrored one another, but Scott was easily the better actor, far surpassing Reeves in intensity. While he has the meatier role between them, Scott effortlessly usurps the film away from Reeves. It's also worth mentioning the sheer amount of talent behind the scenes. Aside from being Corbucci's debut, Sergio Leone, Duccio Tessari and Luciano Martino worked on the script while Enzo Barboni handled photographic duties.

Two babies, abandoned at birth, are nurtured by a wolf and later recovered by a shepherd. The two brothers grow up to lead a band of thieves against two cruel Sabine kings. One of the rulers pursues the two men for revenge and also to retrieve his daughter who has joined their band. The two brothers, one focused and passive, the other quick tempered and unrestrained, are destined to establish the city of Rome, but power and greed threatens to crush the bond between the two brothers.

While Reeves will forever be known as the god of the Torch and Toga genre, Gordon Scott had better credentials. His intimidating looks and penchant for doing dangerous stunts showed a good deal of veracity that was missing from the rest of his colleagues, including the indomitable Steve Reeves. In all of his films, Scott brought an energy that was missing from so many other similar movies. Furthermore, both actors acquit themselves admirably here and there's just as much beauty onscreen as beef and brawn. The script is unusually well mounted with the two main leads displaying a great deal of pathos and depth. Everything about the film reeks of professionalism and Corbucci, who apparently admired Scott's cheery disposition a good deal more, would work with Reeves again the following year in Son of Spartacus, another exceptionally well made motion picture.

Confessions of a Frustrated Housewife / La moglie di mio padre (1976)

2011-09-16T08:44:00.000-07:00

What is most surprising about La moglie di mio padre is how restrained the whole enterprise is. Not because it is part of the unusual yet often compelling Sins Within The Family subgenre of Italian melodrama but because it is directed by inconsistent and occasionally absurd sleazemeister Andrea Bianchi and it is no secret that he has a bit form in the Goodtaste Stakes. While the film is not on par with Fernando Di Leo's excellent La seduzione this effort is in no way horrible, indeed it possesses an interesting premise and is realised with some excellent location work and a delightful yet not atypical lounge type score from De Angelis and De Angelis.

Adolfo Celi is an industrialist suffering from erectile dysfunction, Carroll Baker his frustrated wife and Cesare Barro is the son and third wheel in the relationship who enjoys quiet moments and some footsie with his stepmum. Fellow genre favourite Luigi Pistilli is in this as is, unsurprisingly, Jenny Tamburi, who despite having a minor role in this has a bit of a history in the humping in the household type of film. Unlike La seduzione, which also features Tamburi there is no Lolita connection , no seduction as such but what seems to be a mutually realised adult consensual attraction. It has to be added that there is no real taboo such as incest as in Le sorelle either. Nor should this be confused with the sex comedies that delve into this area such as Malizia, Lover Boy or indeed the equally creepy but ever so slightly less funny Blue Jeans.

Probably better than detractors would have potential viewers believe this is actually a half decent little film. Sure it was never going to trouble the Oscars but it is, for what it is worth, far better than Malabimba or Burial Ground. In this instance, for a change, Bianchi at least makes an effort to play with a straight bat and very nearly manages to pull it off.

Road, The / La Strada (1954)

2011-09-13T15:55:00.000-07:00

Fellini's frequent obsession, the circus, is the centerpiece for this devastating leap from neo-realism to the realms of fantasy and obsession. Anthony Quinn stars as Zampanò, a brutish strongman, and the plot centers around his uneasy relationship with his assistant and a clown, played by Giulietta Masina and Richard Baseheart respectively.

Whilst sharing the same post-war Italy as the likes of The Bicycle Thieves and Umberto D, Fellini eschews the flat, naturalistic feel of De Sica and others and invokes a real sense of almost operatic tragedy and despair. Fellini's later films are, perhaps, more typical of his oeuvre, but his status as an auteur was cemented here.

Quinn and Masina give superb performances here, and Baseheart gives ample evidence that his later career in Knight Rider, Hawaii 5-0 and Columbo was entirely undeserved.

Policewoman in New York, A / La poliziotta a New York (1981)

2011-09-11T11:53:00.000-07:00

La poliziotta a New York is bombastic slapstick nonsense of the lowest kind and while the pace never lets up this is more wearying than entertaining for despite a scattergun approach almost every gag is a misfire.

Luciano Martino has produced some fine comedies with Edwige Fenech unfortunately this isn't one of them. Those interesting in seeing a far more rewarding Tarantini, Martino and Fenech collaboration would be advised to seek out Taxi Girl instead.

Alvaro Vitali is in this. His face is funny but the movie is not.

Good Thief, The / Il ladrone (1980)

2011-09-11T09:28:00.000-07:00

This deliciously subversive Biblical comedy, despite thematically being pretty close to The Life of Brian, is in no way Pythonesque in it's execution and would probably be better compared to the Dudley Moore vehicle Wholly Moses! from the same year.

There are plenty of funny, sweet and the occasional tearjerking moments in a film that Pasquale Festa Campanile directs and is based on his own novel. The lead characters played by Enrico Montesano and Edwige Fenech work really well together and their romantic interaction is most endearing. Claudio Cassinelli is great as Jesus and manages to successully give off a suitably pious air.

The perky and quirky comedy-friendly soundtrack is provided by Ennio Morricone and the Tunisian locations are well captured as they fill in for the Holy Land. While not especially family friendly viewing, and possibly a wee bit offensive to overly sensitive devout types, the film is nevertheless delightful lazy afternoon type entertainment for grown ups.

Swindlers, The / Il Bidone (1955)

2011-09-09T16:14:00.000-07:00

The sight of a beaten Florinda Bolkan crawling, unnoticed, to her demise at a roadside, as children pass by, is one of many possibly coincidental, possibly intentional, parallel scenes in Fulci's Don't Torture a Duckling suggesting that Lucio directed a darker cousin of the already cynical Federico Fellini crime drama and post war morality and amorality tale.

Broderick Crawford, a conman prepared to dress in the robes of the clergy to take advantage of a poor and superstitious peasantry, begins to doubt to the worth of his chosen vocation as a chance meeting with his daughter allows him to question the point of his whole squalid existence.

The world of the conman stands in direct contrast to the necessity of the Bicycle Thief or the Robin Hood type villain of Luca in Contraband. These are people who do it because they can get away with it and live parasitically off the sweat of those facing far less fortunate circumstances suggesting a subtle class conscious subtext.

Dark, yet thoroughly engaging, the movie itself is nothing short of brilliant.

Boccaccio 70 (1962)

2011-09-08T17:51:00.000-07:00

Just as the 2002 portmanteau Three Extremes dissipated the talents of Takashi Miike, Fruit Chan and Park Chan-wook, this earlier collection had a similar effect on three directors of perhaps higher critical acclaim. The collective cinematic accomplishments of Federico Fellini, Vittorio De Sica and Luchino Visconti rank as high as any other, but here all inspiration seems lacking.

The three short films, which include such leading lights as Sophia Loren, Anita Ekberg and Romy Schneider address important issues such as censorship, sexuality and moral conduct are pleasant enough, but given the talents involved, come across as film-making by numbers. De Sica has fun running his camera over Loren's frame, but any erotic charge is lacking. Even an Attack of the 50 Foot Woman pastiche can only raise the interest level a little.

The Italian version contained an extra short, filmed by Mario Monicelli, but even if this was of La Dolce Vita-like quality, the collection could not truthfully be recommended to all but the most serious fans of the directors involved.

Colossus and the Headhunters / Maciste contro i cacciatori di teste (1963)

2011-09-06T17:10:00.000-07:00

Absolutely atrocious, laughably bad Ma-chees-ta adventure with yet another Oscar worthy lead role by the vacuous Kirk Morris headlining once again. With Malatesta at the helm, puerile peplum thrills are guaranteed. From the opening, replete with stock footage from Malatesta's even more uproarious, Maciste Vs. The Monsters, 1962, the filmmakers poorly match up a scene with Morris and his tunic wearing friends to the stock shots of the fur wearing cavemen. Reg Lewis is briefly seen carrying Margaret Lee away. Morris the Mighty does very little here except look confused when he isn't grunting and groaning pretending to get a hernia from tossing and tumbling cardboard objects.

The plot is yet another case of a nicely put together adventure yarn poorly put together. Maciste and a group of survivors escape a volcanic eruption only to end up on an island overrun by a tribe of head hunters who have taken the Urias tribes city of gold by force as well as their king, now blinded by his captors. Led by the traitor, Kermes, the axe wielding decapitators seek the kings daughter for a non-consensual marriage.

The violence level is occasionally strong such as scenes of heads adorning poles, people shot in the face with arrows and a man's face forced into a fire pit. But these gruesome scenes are undermined by asinine direction and a lead that's the equivalent of a walking slab of undercooked beef. The highlight of this imbecilic mess is a scene with a female "performer" who appears to be in a trance, or drugged while she "dances" for the guests. Words cannot do justice to the fatuity of this chuckle worthy sequence. One will also derive a giggle from the sight of Morris sucking in his stomach to make his chest stand out more; something he seemed to do in all his movies. A good viewing experience is nowhere in sight, but if an unintended rib tickler is sought, then the viewer is in good stead with Kirk and company.

Maciste in the Land of the Cyclops / Maciste nella terra dei ciclopi (1961)

2011-09-01T11:34:00.000-07:00

Gordon Mitchell burst onto the mythological movie scene with this sluggish, if popular cult entry in the much, if unfairly maligned Sword & Sandal genre. While he became a popular figure in European cinema, Mitchell is woefully miscast as the hero. His granite faced features were best suited for villains, or anti heroic roles such as his genre defining lead role in Enzo Girolami's classic and brutal The Fury of Achllles, 1962. The sultry Chelo Alonso forgoes her usual sensual, sexually charged dance sequences to tackle the genre mainstay, the evil queen.

The plot is better than the actual movie involving a revenge on the family of Ulysses by the ancestors of the evil Circe. Queen Capys captures the young women and children of Sadok and uses them as sacrifices to Polifemo, the flesh eating cyclops. Maciste must protect the infant heir to the throne of Sadok before Capys makes him Polifemo's snack between meals.

What lets the film down are the fight scenes; they're rather lazily choreographed. Mitchell is energetic, though, it's just the stunt men he's forced to share the screen with are particularly timid. Hack director, Antonio Leonviola gives Mitchell lots of opportunities to flex his muscles so that the bosomy Alonso will swoon in his presence, thereby resulting in the flexing of her own impressive chest. The effects of the gruesome cyclops are nicely accomplished, if crudely rendered and a sequence where Maciste is the center of a tug-of-war match while standing on two thin boards above a lion pit is suitably tense.

00-2 Most Secret Agents / 002 agenti segretissimi (1964)

2011-08-28T08:50:00.000-07:00

It is frustrating how Franco and Ciccio are able to entertain and simultaneously annoy so much within the same feature and 002 agenti segretissimi is a fine example of this phenomenon as some wonderfully timed comic pieces are neutralised by the infantile gurning and hollering of Franco Franchi. The pairing are at times simply far too bombastic in this early 1960s Lucio Fulci comedy.

002 agenti segretissimi at it's best is hilarious and a sequence with a control panel of unlabeled switches in a hotel is comedy genius as the idiotic duo attempt to switch on lights or open the blinds resulting in much mistaken switch mirth.

As a time capsule piece many ideas are, just as with the Cold War premise, outdated and playing to not too funny ethnic stereotyping but, even while providing the film with a limited pass on the account of it being "of it's time", the greatest pity of all is that there wasn't far more use made of locations in this Riviera set comedy and it dwells too much in uninspiring studio interiors.

Bye Bye Monkey / Ciao maschio (1978)

2011-08-25T15:22:00.000-07:00

Marco Ferreri brings to the screen possibly the only film ever made containing Gerard Depardieu, Marcello Mastroianni, a porn starlet and King Kong's dead body. Carrying on from the strangeness of his Don't Touch the White Woman, Ferreri introduces what seems to be an alternative, slightly futuristic, New York populated by bizarre characters and 1930s monster movie stars.

The plot involves rape, frequent nudity, inter-species adoption and the sight of a professional cast trying their hardest while Ferreri spins the insanity wheel. The film looks glossy, is obviously well made, and therein lies the problem. The material would be far better suited for a cheap, down and dirty exploitationer rather than this multi-national collaboration. In the hands of a less competent director, the giant ape could have gone toe-to-toe with John Saxon or Fred Williamson, with Edwige Fenech looking on adoringly. Instead, Ferreri gives a film which ultimately falls between the art house and the grindhouse, which will leave both camps disappointed.

Burn! / Queimada (1969)

2011-08-21T07:38:00.000-07:00

Queimada, a Portugese governed island within the Carribean during the mid 1800's. British agent, William Walker is sent on a three part mission, to incite rebellion amongst the slaves, turn over the sugar trade to England, and lastly, return the slaves to servitude.

This beautifully directed historical action drama by Gillo Pontecorvo, is nothing short of a masterpiece. As the drama and action manifests itself upon the screen, one sometimes feels as if one is watching historical events unfold before them through the window of a time machine, thanks to Pontecorvo's documentary style of film making. Featuring the great Marlon Brando as agent William Walker, a fabulously complex character who will go to any length to fulfill his mission and first time actor Evaristo Márquez, who gives a striking, strong and beleivable performance as Jose Dolores, the slave leader and friend to Walker. Ennio Morricone's score is both equally beautiful and haunting.

Burn! is a very bold film, a film that strangely does not take sides. Is not black, nor white, but tells history as history should be told on film. Needless to say, Burn! is very compelling and moving cinema and a work of genius.

Ten Zan: The Ultimate Mission / Missione finale (1988)

2011-08-19T18:37:00.000-07:00

Surely one of the few Italian/North Korean co-productions, Ten Zan, despite it's obvious limitations, gives an enjoyable, sub-Wild Geese viewing experience. Journeyman director Ferdinando Baldi teamed up with a then up and coming Frank Zagarino and Cannibal Terror's Sabrina Siani plus an incomprehensible plot featuring deer extract and Nazi-style villains.

The budget was obviously large, and the action is fairly well staged, as is to be expected from an experienced old hand like Baldi. The cast, especially Zagarino, throw themselves into proceedings, and any shortcomings in the plot, of which there are many, are glossed over by the next set-piece.

Unsurprisingly, given the financiers, North Korean culture comes across as quite tempting, and if film-loving, Hans Blix-hating Kim Jong Il has a favourite action movie, this must be it.